it's just P U T R I..

2010 - a year full of blessings

2011-01-01T09:59:00.003+08:00

If i said that 2009 was the challenging year - a year when i tried to find my journey back and a year to open my eyes to many things, then i will said that 2010 has been a wonderful year.

A year when i found that:

You planned your life while you dream about it.

Dreams could be reached if you believe so.

Hope and faith is needed to achieve your dreams.

Everything is really happened for reasons as you can never predict life.

Your positive energy will lead you to a peaceful life.

Learning can never ever be stopped.

Listening and being sincere is a must in maintaining a friendship.

And light is always there in every misery.

But most importantly i will always remember 2010 as: The answer of my prayer. And i'm thanking to Allah SWT to make that happened. I kneel, i bow, and i am thankful for all of His blessings to me.

Why?

The doubt of my career in my old office has been replaced by the excitement to continue my study in the Netherlands by April - May. Then the worried about how i can adapt in Netherlands kind of substitute my excitement. But in the end, i believed that everything is going to be OK and Allah SWT will lead the way. As the results: yes - it turned out perfectly.

Hopefully things that happened last 2010 can made me wiser, stronger, smarter, and more mature.

And Allah SWT will always continue His blessings and lead me the way in order to complete my journey.

---

Friends are definitely come and go, and you know that is the consequences of life.

I left my very best friends in Jakarta and i pursued a new friendship in the Netherlands.

I still missed my dears: Mikha, Rani, Thia, Devin, Kiki, Tika, Ditya, mbak Rini and mbak Heni but i know that they will always in my heart and be there whenever i need them.

I am grateful with my new friends in the Netherlands: Farah and the rest of red 6 - the international buddy group, the classmates from Work and Organizational Psychology class, Ajeng and the rest of PPI - Tilburg's members, Kak Pipit and the rest of Indonesian people that based in Tilburg, and Putir and the rest of Indonesian students that spread across the Netherlands.

Family will never leave you alone and you know that you do not need to be tied by blood to have a new family.

I know and i belief that all of my family love me and support me to complete my journey along the way, but because they are in Jakarta, they support me by their prayer and i belief it makes me stronger indeed.

But again, i'm blessed. I found a new family here. Thanks to Farah that introduced me to tante Yanti's family. If something's urgent happened (knocks on wood), i know that who i have to run to.

---

My dear friends and family, thank you.

Thank you for always be there whenever i need you guys.

I won't survived this year without your support and i hope i can still count on you next year and forever.

I pray that we all still have dreams to be reached and belief that it will slowly come true.

Hope and Faith is still in our heart and we always push your positive energy out to make the peaceful of mind.

I hope that next will be better than before, remember, it is not about the "new" you, but it is about the "improved" you.

I pray that family and friends will be still there for each other and love will surround us without any doubt.

And that whatever it is will be the best for us, for our self.

Happy new year 2011.

Love,

Putri

thank you

2010-01-21T23:50:00.003+08:00

Have i say thank you to technology for making our life easier?

I'm thanking to founder of:
twitter
facebook
friendster
ym
bbm
for inventing those social networking tools kind of thing.

Because of those, my friends can get my birthday reminder.
And by that, i know that I've been surrounded by wonderful friends.
Friend from elementary school to my working collage - from those who know me very well to who i just met occasionally - from those who are living in New York to those who are living in my neighborhood.

Wow, i cant say their name one by one. But it just make me feel loved.

Thank you guys.

Even if we hardly met or keep contact, you guys still willing to spend a couple second to drop by and said happy birthday to me.

Again - thank you. You guys are simply the best.

you - the second family

2010-01-05T16:08:00.000+08:00

You know what's funny about us?

Yes - about our small but lovely second family.

Is that we always claimed that we miss each other a lot in email but yet, when we went online together, we rarely shared a big news. It seamed that nothing big to tell.

Sometimes we only gave a bit update but we definitely can stare each other via web cam in quite long time just only to see your face and hear your voice. That's quite enough to contend our longings feeling.

And that's totally fine.

Cause honestly, what I miss most from you guys is simply your daily behavior and your simply presence whenever i need you guys.

I miss you - Thia "nyonyah kitell" with off course your kitell-ness and your acted as emak2 if i was sick.

I miss you - Devin "piggy clumsy" with your clumsiness around house and your positive thinking during my low momment.

I miss you - Kris "si cempreng" with your out loud voice and your "speak up your mind" attitude.

I miss you - Mus "si lemot" with your patience and tolerance even though we bully you a lot.

I miss you - mbak Dita "si anak kecil" as the youngest one - with your "always try to cheer us up anytime and every time" atitude.

I miss our quality time.
I miss your presence a lot.
I miss time when i can call you any time.
I miss time when i can come to see you guys any time.
I miss time when i can cuddle and hug you guys.
I miss our adventure time.

Do you guys remember when was our last time to take picture? Our last time we meet each other? The six of us?

It was during Kiki's reception. Which was last year. I repeated, last year.
And we even don't have our picture together!
So, ourlast picture was taken during Tika's reception.

God, I know that we just have conference last night and didn't share news - everything seamed ordinary. Seeing Dee, watching Tika's belly. But still I miss your presence so much!

Well, yes i know that i realize that our lives is changed right now.
We live separately now.
We have our own life now: 1 hot mommy, 1 mommy to be, 1 dedicated housewife, 2 bride to be (ok, gw emang ngasal dan minta digaplok.. hihihi), and me - the single one.

But can i always say "i miss you" even though we just met online and not discuss anything?

By the way, thank you for making my life more colorful yah. My life definitely won't be the same without you guys.

Regrets, Bless - Thankful, Hope & Faith

2010-01-02T21:56:00.002+08:00

For the wonderful 2009:

There won't be any regrets,
For what i did and felt in the past,
For every path that i choose,
For all the choice that i took,
For all the journey that I've been through.

What's left is only a bless-full feeling - a thankful note,
For every lessons that i took,
For every experiences that i received,
To every gifts and loves that Allah SWT gave to me,
To every persons that have been there for me - in my high & low moment.

Those has made me to become what i am right now.
Still trying to figure what i want to do with my life,
Still learning how to survive in this world,

For the upcoming-hopefully-more-wonderful 2010:

All i have right now is Hope, and Faith.
That next will be better than before,
That dream will be slowly come true,
That family and friends will be still there for each other,
That whatever it is will be the best for us, for our self.

Happy New Year 2010.

Life

2009-11-09T19:49:00.002+08:00

This is how i see life should be:

Take small steps to achieve your dream.
And never satisfied with what you got.

Acknowledge people who are always there when you need them,
and simply share your happiness with them.

Don't stressed out you life,
and just simply make a new family.

Gathered up your friends,
and make sure you're always be there for them.

Laughed out you stupidity with your friends,
and love your family.

Don't forget to make them proud,
and just remember that they were never leave you alone.

Live yourself,
enjoy yourself,
and do whatever you want to do.

Believe that dreams come true every day - because they do

2009-05-20T23:27:00.004+08:00

Take a look at yourself in the mirror.
Who do you see looking back?
Is it the person you want to be?

Or is there someone else you were meant to be,
the person you should have been but fell short of?

Is someone telling you that you can´t or you won't?
Because you can.

Believe that love is out there.

Believe that dreams come true every day.
Because they do.

Sometimes happiness doesn't come from money or fame or power.
Sometimes happiness comes from good friends and family.
And from the quiet nobility of living a good life.

Believe that dreams come true every day.
Because they do.

Believe that dreams come true every day.
Because they do.

So take a look in that mirror and remind yourself to be happy,
because you deserve to be. Believe that.

And believe that dreams come true every day.
Because they do.

(taken from the last episode of One Tree Hill season 6)

catatan akhir pemilu caleg - part 1

2009-04-10T01:25:00.002+08:00

Hari untuk mencontreng caleg telah tiba, dan saya, seperti kebanyakkan masyarakat Indonesia pun ikut melaksanakan tugas negara ini. 5 menit untuk 5 tahun, itu kata Cokelat. Banyak hal yang bisa diambil dari pengalaman mencontreng kali ini, baik itu yang hal kecil maupun permainan besar dibalik pemilu caleg ini.

Ini sudah ke-3 kalinya saya ikut pemilu, and for the first time saya mengomel. Bukan, saya tidak mengomel karena nama saya tidak ada dalam daftar pemilih ataupun karena saya harus mengantri panjang hanya untuk mencontreng. Saya, seperti kebanyakan orang (yang saya tahu), mengomel karena besarnya kertas yang harus dibuka. It's too much. The paper was so big and for me, complecated. Mungkin saya berlebihan, mungkin. Tapi saya yakin banyak yang berfikiran sama.

Besarnya kertas tentu akan dikaitkan dengan banyaknya partai yang ikut pemilu tahun ini. Kalau tidak salah ada lebih dari 40 partai yang berpartisipasi. Come on guys. Segitu kita terpecah belahkah? Sampai sekarang saya masih tidak mengerti kenapa ada banyak partai. Ok. Saya mulai bicara ngawur. Niat saya dalam post ini adalah membahas masalah teknis.

Jadi tadi beberapa hal yang menganggu:
1. besarnya kertas.
2. kecilnya bilik untuk memilih.
3. ribet harus membuka dan melipat kembali kertas.
4. belum lagi takut salah masukin ke kotak yang mana.

Soal kecilnya bilik, sadar gak sih, kemungkinan orang lain untuk tahu pilihan kita tuh besar? Katanya harus rahasia, tapi kok bisa keiintip? Hehe..

Nah, berkaitan sama pemilihian hari ini, ada yang bisa menjelaskan fungsi DPD kah??

25 random things about me - seriously

2009-01-31T21:51:00.005+08:00

Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose people to be tagged. It's supposed to be 25 people, but no pressure. You have to tag the person who tagged you.

Here it goes..

1. Supposed to write this on FB, but since my blog affiliates with my FB, decided to write this on my blog. And did think that this was stupid things to do, but still did it for the sake of so-called-friendship (wakakak.. peace nyet!).

2. Was freak out right before my 24th birthday! - felt that doing nothing and did not achieve anything.

3. 've been blogging since 2004 - but only had 200 posts or so.

4. Am not smart, but do believe i am a hard worker (though sometimes have a lazy butt).

5. Family lovers - my big family is my everything.

6. Some people call me: stone heart - what do you think?

7. Love Brisbane - and still have Brisbanesick sometimes. Wishing to go back there soon.

8. Internet and fan fiction freak!! - can spend all day long sitting in front of my laptop and do all the browsing thing plus reading fan fiction (bet people don't know about fan fiction).

9. Traveler wannabe - still saving money for it.

10. Love my friends and "the second family" - my life won't be the same without you guys!

11. Don't like shopping - if i do shop, i'll spend my money for things that i need.

12. Like to take pictures (family, friends, scenery, objects) - and just realized that so many pictures with good memories without me on it! Ooh, and planning to buy SLR camera to support my hobby (winks.. winks..).

13. A bit obsessive - everything must be in order: how to wash clothes, cleaning the room, putting money, ... Though sometimes i am messy person, especially during stress. Also a bit perfectionist - though sometimes missing details. LOL.

14. Really want to continue my study in somewhere Europe or Australia - even though still don't know the major is.

15. Never been in serious relationship. ;)

16. Do feel that "university period" was the best time of my life instead of "high school period" like everybody else. Love UQ (who doesn't love UQ?)!

17. Have grammer / english limitation - pretty sure Mikha will complain about this post soon.

18. Love kids - like to play and take care of them. Always miss kids around me: my cousin Syira, my nephew Andhika, and kids from Playhouse UQ (Missy, Anna, Edward, Tobby - hey, still remember their name!).

19. Have a close relationship with my team in the office. - Uhuy!

20. Sometimes feel stuck and get bored with my life. As Thia said: so-called-Quarter life crisis (LOL).

21. Never smoke. My asthma prevent me to do it. And also hate smokers - come on guys, stop smoking please!

22. Afraid of height - will cure this soon.

23. Animals hater - and thinking why people like to pet it!

24. Was sports freak during high school - but then suddenly stoped from all those sport things and got fatter and bigger - and now very lazy to start sports again.

25. am blessed - I have wonderful family, lovely friends, great co-workers, and stable job. What else do i need? Ooh, probably a prince charming? LOL.

Is this enough Mik? LOL.

Potrait of Friend

2009-01-03T00:04:00.002+08:00

"Portrait of a Friend"

I can't give solutions to all of life's problems, doubts, or fears.
But I can listen to you, and together we will search for answers.

I can't change your past with all it's heartache and pain,nor the future with its untold stories.
But I can be there now when you need me to care.

I can't keep your feet from stumbling.
I can only offer my hand that you may grasp it and not fall.

Your joys, triumphs, successes, and happiness are not mine;
Yet I can share in your laughter.

Your decisions in life are not mine to make, nor to judge;
I can only support you, encourage you,and help you when you ask.

I can't prevent you from falling away from friendship,from your values, from me.
I can only pray for you, talk to you and wait for you.

I can't give you boundaries which I have determined for you,
But I can give you the room to change, room to grow,room to be yourself.

I can't keep your heart from breaking and hurting,
But I can cry with you and help you pick up the pieces and put them back in place.

I can't tell you who you are. I can only love you and be your friend.

--Unknown

Happy New Year 2009

2009-01-01T19:22:00.003+08:00

A glass of wine and a bottle of juice,
Kenny Rogers for a dinner,
Beard papa for the dessert,
A room with to-die-for view and full with the best friends,
Calm and peaceful environment surrounding with favorites music,

The perfect way to end 2008 and welcoming 2009.

Happy New Year 2009 Guys.

Wish you all the best of luck.

cheers,
Putri

everybodys' hero

2008-12-11T23:36:00.003+08:00

Have you ever think how does it feels to be Superman?
Save every people.
Support every people.
Be there for every people.

Have you ever ask who's gonna be Superman's hero?
I mean, seriously man, if Superman needs help, whom did he ask?

Do you aware that you are somebody's hero?
You may not even realize it, but i do believe that everybody is somebody's hero.
So you are a hero, and you have a hero around you (though he's not wearing a mantel), but you just simply do not recognize them.

A hero, is not always the strongest person in the world.
Is not always the most beautiful person in the world.
Or is not always the smartest person in the world.

A hero, is someone who will always be there for you, no matter what.
Someone that you can lean on, trust your life on, and definitely someone who can catch you when you fall.

To be a hero is tiring, and conflicting as well.
Is not always full of people's cheering, but it's about sacrifice.

How is somebody can sacrifice their life for somebody's else.

I do feel that sometimes, in some occasion, that i am somebody's hero, no, much wider, everybody's hero.

I do realize that sometimes i put people's happiness in front of my own happiness.
I do take people's burden as i don't want people get stuck with their burden.
I do know that i always be there for my friend, even though they do not aware of it.
I do sacrifice my own, to save people's.

And that is so damn tiring.
Happy, but tiring.

However, when i admit my limitation, people will denied my limitation, and will told me that i lied to them. Or tell me that i just treat something little as a big deal.

A hero will always be the source of everything, the perfect one, the guide, and the first one.

But who is gonna catch them if they fall?

Who's gonna catch me when i fall?

I can catch you if you fall.
Can you catch me if i fall?

Surprise me then.

birthday wish

2008-11-30T21:52:00.002+08:00

Birthday Wishes For My Friend

On your birthday,
I wish for you the fulfillment
of all your fondest dreams.
I hope that for every candle
on your cake
you get a wonderful surprise.
I wish for you that
whatever you want most in life,
it comes to you,
just the way you imagined it,
or better.
I hope you get as much pleasure
from our friendship as I do.
I wish we were sisters,
so I could have known you
from the beginning.
I look forward to
enjoying our friendship
for many more of your birthdays.
I'm so glad you were born,
because you brighten my life
and fill it with joy.

Happy Birthday!

-----

Hi Kris,
Happy birthday yah.
Iyah, saya sadar kalau kamu ulang tahun tanggal 2 Desember, bukan hari ini.
Tapi kamu tahu kan betapa hecticnya saya kalau sedang office hours. Bisa-bisa saya lupa akan postingan saya ini.
Jadi, saya posting sekarang saja, tapi tenang saja, semoga pada waktunya nanti saya akan tetap bisa sms kamu dan mengucapkan Happy Birthday padamu.

Hi si Cempreng,
Happy birthday yah.
Senangnya tahun ini sudah ada suami dan calon bayi, jadi kado tak ternilai tuh.
Semoga semua berjalan lancar yah babe.
Gak sabar deh menunggu kedatangan dirimu dan perut buncit mu. Hehehe..

Hi Bumil,
Happy birthday yah,
Sedih juga saya tidak bisa merayakannya bersama kamu. Tapi kamu akan pulang ke Jakarta bulan depan kan? Kangen berat nih sama kamu.

Hi si keras kepala,
Really, wish you all the very best yah.
Semoga di ulang tahun ini kamu mendapatkan segala apapun yang kamu inginkan.
Semoga kamu diberi kesehatan dan kesejahteraan untuk keluargamu.

Hi Kiki,
The poem below is for you yah.
Enjoy your pregnancy babe. Gak sabar jadi tante nih!

-----

Mum-to-be

Your eyes are bright and sparkling.
Your cheeks have got a glow.
Your belly's being touched and rubbed
by people you don't know.
You're craving weird, exotic foods
and calories don't matter.
You can't remember life without
an elbow in your bladder.
You're getting medical advice
from everyone you see
Welcome to the joyous days
of Motherhood-to-be.

So you're getting enggage..

2008-11-23T17:04:00.004+08:00

We are all a little weird
And life's a little weird,
And when, like you, you find
Someone whose weirdness is compatible with yours,
You join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness
And call it love

------

Dear My lovely ex-housemates,
Am so happy for you.
Ever since you told me about him, i know that you have feeling on him.
Then you go for it, not denied it.
Try to build a relationship when probably most of your friends do not like the idea of him.
But you know that he is worth it.

Dear my dear friend,
Am so happy for you.
For what you have been through and finally arrive on this stage.
And then will continue to the next step.
Salute to you babe. You made it.

Dear The clumsy one,
Am so happy for you.
We all know that you'll be the first one to get married.
And now, it's happened. How does it feel mate?
Time flies huh?

Dear hua-hua us-us,
Am so happy for you.
Don't be scared to tell other the truth.
That you love him, he loves you.
That you are his, and he is yours.
People will understand that, and will support you along the way.
If you have faith in your relationship, then tell the world about it.
Take your time though, and let the world decide what's gonna happened next.

Dear the neutral one,
Am so happy for you.
For me, you deserved all the happiness in the world.
If i could shared mine then i would. But i guess you won't need it.
You find it in him, and i hope he can make you happy.
Otherwise he has to deal with me, seriously.

Dear member of my second family,
Am so happy for you.
Even words can not describe it.
Just want to let you know the usual..

that..
I,
Love you.
Cherish you.
Support you.

and.. I'll be here if you need me, as always.

This poem for you babe, though i found it in the internet:

"No sooner met but they looked;
no sooner looked but they loved;
no sooner loved but they sighed;
no sooner sighed but they asked one another the reason;
no sooner knew the reason but they sought the remedy;
and in these degrees have they made a pair of stairs to marriage"

Shakespeare said that
"You fancied the pants off each other"

I said that
"Many, many Congratulations"

Wish you all the very best babe.
I know you'll be fine.

cheers,
Putri

3 difficult things

2008-10-26T23:43:00.001+08:00

3 hal yang suka dilupakan manusia dan paling susah dilakukan:
1. Bersyukur
2. Iklhas
3. Tulus

Do you agree?

go ahead

2008-10-13T22:49:00.004+08:00

I know that everything is on your shoulder right now.
I know that everybody is depend on you right now.
I know that you are physically and mentally tired right now.
I know that you sick with this condition and really wanna go away, running away.

Maybe it's about time for you,
To analyzee your objective.
To think about your future plan.
To re-visited your dream.
To find your aim.

We both know that we wont be together in long time, our time is short.
It would be either me, or you who will go first.
It doesn't matter.

If our cross will path again, then it will path.
Then we'll meet again.

But if it won't, it would be ok too.
Cause i know that you'll take care of me somehow.

If you want to go, then go.
I'll be fine. Really.

Just take care yourself.
And don't worry, you're still have me.

I'll always be you shoulder to cry on. No matter what.
Support you as always.
Cheerish you as always.
Love you as always.
and Miss you as always.

Maybe i'm amazed

2008-09-14T23:19:00.003+08:00

Maybe i’m amazed,
With our new life as so-called an adult.
In which have our own things and problems to deal with.

Maybe i’m amazed,
That time flies very quickly and suddenly we are becoming a new person.
With a new life, and unfortunately we do not share the life anymore.

Maybe i’m amazed,
With all of our decision. My decision, your decision.
It showed that all of us learn how to be a grown up person right now.

Maybe i’m amazed,
That we all trying to catch our dreams separately.
And trying to survive in this life, well as we know, life is a bitch, so get used to it.

Maybe i’m amazed,
With all of our movement.
Trying to move on from our own Brisbanesick, and trying to embarace our own future.

Maybe i’m amazed,
Maybe i’m scared,
Maybe i’m excited,

With our new life.
With our sudden change.

Kris with the baby.
Mus with the hubby.
Mik with the PhD.
Ran with the Singapore.
Vin with the relationship.
Dit with the independency.
Nyah with the routine.
Me with the job.

All of those things amazed me.
And slap me in the face, to remind me about life.

Life is always move forward, never backward.
It is should be filled with joy and hope, and with no regards.

Maturity is a key,
Growing up is a process,
and time will answer that.

For you and only

2008-07-21T22:56:00.009+08:00

Friends that watch your back
Friends that play with your heart
All act the same from the start
Before you know it some disappear
Others stay beside you for life
Those are the friends
The best friends

Good day all,
How do you do ladies? Kinda miss you all right now.
Really miss your laugh, miss your hug, and miss our closure mostly.
I actually really want to write something for you all, however apologized must be said since I have writer’s block at the moment.
Anyway, this email is special for Kristina actually. May your fairytale come true. :)

My Dear Kris,
The one who always make us surprise.
So Kris, tomorrow is the day yah. How do you feel?
I know that you will denial this at first. You will say that everything is ok without any further explanation. Hehehe..
You know Kris, at this time, you are the one that I really want to meet.
I really want to hug you and give my wish to you personally, face to face.
I really want to to be with you during your midodareni, your last ladies moment.
I really wish I were there Kris. Enjoy the moment, cherish the time.
Watching you to do your step, listening to you when your man said his vow,
and I will definitely make him promised to take a very good care to you indeed.
Too bad I can not be with you tomorrow Kris.
But you know what, i’ll be here, along the way.
Support you.Encourage you.And wishing you all the happiness in the world. Congratulations Kris.I’m so happy for you.

And this is for you.
Hope you like it.
Love you and miss you as always.

Marriage
by Kahlil Gibran

When Almitra spoke again and said,
"And what of Marriage, master?"
And he answered saying:
You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore.
You shall be together when white wings of death scatter your days.
Aye, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together, yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.

cheers,
Putri

Forever Friends

2008-07-13T01:13:00.006+08:00

(images taken from google)

Friends,
As we know, life is always move forward, never going backward.
Life is always change and things will not be the same as usual.
Dreams will always be followed and support from each other will be needed.
Adaptation will be hard but we know that it is only a phase.
The feeling of losing someone will be felt but i know that we will always together in heart.
The time has arrived friends, we shall move on to our next step.
Together, hand in hand. Shall we?
(Nurhayati, 2008)

you can stand under my umbrella

2008-07-13T01:00:00.006+08:00

Umbrella - Rihanna

You had my heart, and we'll never be a world apart
Maybe in magazines but you'll still be my star
But baby 'cause in the dark you will see shiny cars
And that's when you need me there
With you I'll always share because

When the sun shines we shine together
Told you I'll be here forever
That I'll always be your friend
Took an oath, I'mma stick it out 'til the end
Now that it's raining more than ever know that we still have each other
You can stand under my umbrella
You can stand under my umbrella (ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella (ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella (ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella (ella ella eh eh eh)

The fancy things they're never coming in between
You're apart of my entity
Here for infinity
When the war has took it's part
When the world has dealt it's cards
If the hand is hard
Together we'll mend your heart because

When the sun shines we shine together
Told you I'll be here forever
That I'll always be your friend
Took an oath, I'mma stick it out 'til the end
Now that it's raining more than ever know that we still have each other
You can stand under my umbrella
You can stand under my

You can run into my arms
It's okay, don't be alarmed
Come into me
So gonna let the rain pour
I'll be all you need and more because

When the sun shines we shine together
Told you I'll be here forever
That I'll always be your friend
Took an oath, I'mma stick it out 'til the end
Now that it's raining more than ever know that we still have each other
You can stand under my umbrella
You can stand under my

It's raining (raining)
Ooh baby it's raining (raining)
Come into me
Come into me
It's raining (raining)
Ooh baby it's raining (raining)
Come into me
Come into me
(Ella ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella (ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella (ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella (ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella (ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella (ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella (ella ella eh eh eh)
Under my umbrella (ella ella eh eh eh eh eh-eh)

-----
This is for you guys, cause whenever wherever you need me: I'll be here. You definitely can stand under my umbrella.

my lemot is getting married

2008-06-28T01:02:00.005+08:00

Friendships come and Friendships go
Like wave upon the sand
Like day and night
Like birds in flight
Like snowflakes when they land
But you and I are something else
Our friendship's here to stay
Like weeds and rocks and dirty socks
It never goes away!

---

Mus si lemot,
Kamu adalah orang paling sabar yang pernah saya temui selama ini. Disaat teman-temanmu yang lain mengomel, biasanya kamu hanya bengong mendengarkan dan menengankan. Selalu pasrah kalau diledek, selalu mengalah kepada yang lain, dan selalu siap membantu kita semua.
Kita kenal sudah berapa lama yah Mus? Almost 5 years i think. Kita memang baru dekat di Brisbane, but i think it is more than enough to know you better. And definitely enough to love you (love as a friend, a family to be precise).
You know what, it is impossible to not love you Mus.
You are so kind, so generous, gentle, and passionate. Kamu bisa menerima kekurangan orang apa adanya, tidak pernah megeluh, dan selalu sabar menghadapi kita.
You never make us angry to you. It is impossible to get angry to you.
Siapa sih yang bisa marah sama kamu Mus? Apalagi kalau kamu sudah memperlihatkan tampang plengomu dan ucapan-ucapan lemot mu. Yang ada orang malah ketawa Mus. Hehehe..

Mus-Mus,
You're getting married tomorrow Mus.
Sesuatu yang sudah kita semua prediksi dari awal: you'll be the first one who is getting married.
Saya senang Mus, karena kamu secara perlahan tapi pasti akan meraih impian mu. Berjalan menatap masa depan dengan pangeran mu. Saya senang Mus, karena kamu mantap menatap hidup.
Saya bangga Mus sama kamu, karena kamu telah berhasil membuat satu pilihan hidup.
Tidak semua orang bisa dengan mudahnya memutuskan untuk menikah dan berkeluarga, coba lihat saya, nampaknya yang ada di pikiran saya hanyalah kerja, kerja, dan kerja.
Saya senang punya teman seperti kamu Mus, yang bisa mengingatkan saya supaya saya cepat-cepat menyusul kamu Mus.

Terima kasih yah Mus.
Sudah mau menjadi teman saya, sudah mau saya anggap sebagai keluarga kedua saya.
Kamu, Kris, Nyah, Mbak, dan Dev akan selalu mendapat tempat yang special di hati saya.
Saya sayang sekali sama kamu Mus. Dan saya akan sedih sekali kalau kamu kembali ke Brisbane dengan si-calon-suami-mu-yang-besok-akan-menjadi-suami-mu.

Selamat yah Mus.
Selamat menempuh hidup baru.
I'm sure you'll be fine. Kamu sukses menghadapi 5 teman mu yang aneh-aneh ini, pasti kamu juga akan sanggup menghadapi suamimu dan calon keluargamu nantinya.
I believe i you, you have the strength to make all you dreams come true.
So this is for you Mus.

To you my dear,
the one who will getting married tomorrow.

As you start out together
Along life's busy road
Remember, bring your dreams with you,
They lighten every load
And then you will discover
As your journey starts today
That happiness walks with you
Hand-in-hand along the way.

Happy Wedding Day Mus.
Wish you all the very best.

100 tahun kebangkitan bangsa

2008-05-20T23:26:00.003+08:00

Melihat tim Indonesia berlaga dalam perebutan piala Thomas dan piala Uber kemarin menyentil perasaan nasionalisme saya. Betapa terharunya saya melihat mereka berjuang sepenuh tenaga danmaju terus pantang mundur. Semangat mereka menaik, terlebih karena faktor penonton Indonesia yang memang terkenal luar biasa. Mereka pun jadinya bermain dengan luar biasa juga. Kita memang kalah, tapi saya yakin mereka sudah berusaha sebaik mungkin. Semoga dengan adanya peringatan 100 tahun kebangkitan bangsa, pemerintah menjadi aware akan keberadaan atlit2 kita. Tidak hanya atlit bulutangkis, tapi semua cabang olahraga.

Kenapa saya bilang demikian, karena, apakah kita semua sadar bahwa sistem regenarsi kita sangatlah menyedihkan, tidak hanya dalam olahraga, dalam semua bidang. Coba perhatikan, berapa banyak politikus muda Indonsia? Eh, tunggu, tidak semua bidang deng, dalam dunia ekonomi Indonesia sudah mulai menapakkan gigi. Ada banyak manager yang masih berusia dibawah 40 tahun (walaupun kebanyakkan dari mereka bekerja di perusahaan swasta). Yah, setidaknya ada regenerasi lah.

Anyway, melihat acara TV malam ini, peringatan 100 tahun kebangkitan nasional diperingati secara meriah sekali yah. Good. Walaupun saya tahu acara tersebut pasti banyak mengalami kritikan karena menghabiskan dana banyak, tapi saya yakin, banyak yang tersentil melihat betapa kayanya negara kita, betapa bersatunya negara kita.

Lalu, saya bepikir: Apa yang bisa saya lakukan untuk negara ini?

Saya coba list daftar prilaku yang mungkin bisa disumbangkan untuk negara ini, walaupun hanya sepersekian nol koma sekian persen:

1. Patuhi rambu lalu lintas.
2. Tidak membuang sampah sembarangan.
3. Tidak mencoret-coret fasilitas umum
4. Membayar pajak tepat waktu
5. Tidak KKN

eh tunggu deh, kok saya seperti belajar PPKN or PMP jaman sekolah dulu yah?

Ada yang bisa menambahkan prilaku konkrit untuk membangkitkan semangat bangsa?

the Twinning 2003

2008-04-28T22:02:00.002+08:00

part 2 of this posting.
Have you met my friends before?
Please, let me introduce you to my fellow classmates for the last 4 years.
Hopefully, even though we already graduated and spread away, we're still a good friend in our heart.
---
Today, was the day that i realize that we're still have a bond on each other.
We're still supported each other.
We're still shared the same story.
We're still trying to catch our own dreams.
We're still always be there when one of us need it.

Do you think we'll still keep in touch in the next couple of years?

simple things that can make you happy

2008-04-25T21:21:00.003+08:00

could you tell me simple things that can make you happy?

my mom can be very happy if one of her student can understand the math and got a very good mark for the evaluation.
my sister can be very happy if there is a new korean movie in the web.
my dad can be very happy if he met his friends.

i can be happy after reading people's blog.
i can be happy after taking pictures with my co-workers.
i can be happy after i spent time talking non sense with my best friend.
i can be happy after i saw my cousin.
i can be happy after i received a very good news from my friends.

i can be happy if people's around me happy.

how about you?

level of trust

2008-04-15T22:59:00.000+08:00

do you think that the level of trust will decrease if people went apart?

Bad Day - Daniel Powter

2008-02-24T01:20:00.004+08:00

Where is the moment we needed the most
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
They tell me your blue skies fade to grey
They tell me your passion's gone away
And I don't need no carryin' on

You stand in the line just to hit a new low
You're faking a smile with the coffee to go
You tell me your life's been way off line
You're falling to pieces everytime
And I don't need no carryin' on

Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day
You had a bad day

Well you need a blue sky holiday
The point is they laugh at what you say
And I don't need no carryin' on

You had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day

(Oh.. Holiday..)

Sometimes the system goes on the blink
And the whole thing turns out wrong
You might not make it back and you know
That you could be well oh that strong
And I'm not wrong

So where is the passion when you need it the most
Oh you and I
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost

Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
You've seen what you like
And how does it feel for one more time
You had a bad day
You had a bad day

Had a bad day
Had a bad day
Had a bad day
Had a bad day
Had a bad day

unpredictable

2008-02-17T15:25:00.003+08:00

"We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us."
(E.M Forster)

Ok, i admit. I'm so easily inspired right now. Every quotes or poems that's represent my current situation had more deeper meaning for me now.

Those quotes, are exactly what i feel right now.

I, the one who always plan and organize things, the one who always want certainty, have become skeptic.

I always know what i want to do, always know what my goals are.
But now, i have no idea about it.

Maybe it's true, we have to make life more exciting.
Let every thing's come as surprises and make your life more colorful.

Adjust with the unpredictable.
Let it scattered.
Think out of the box, you're not robot.
And embrace the amazing experience.

a new day

2008-02-16T00:41:00.003+08:00

No one can go back in time and make a new brand start,
But anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending,

God didn't promise days without pain,
Laughter without sorrow,
Sun without rain,

But he did promise strength for the day,
Comfort for the tears,
And lights for the way.

(anonymous) - taken from iwan's blog
-----

We can not running away from the problems, cause we know the problems will always catch us.
The black shadow can not be avoided, we must face the reality.
Newbies can be wrong, even experienced people can make mistakes.
We are only a human, where no one's perfect.

Deals with it one by one.
Don't be afraid, cause there's always first time for everything.
If not, how can you know how to do things?

I'M NOT A QUITTER

2008-02-13T21:28:00.002+08:00

I'M NOT A QUITTER

I hope that i can still said it in the next couple of months.

Learning is never easy. It takes times, it takes patience, it takes energy, and mostly it takes willingness. Willingness to learn. Willingness to fall.

Sometimes, people do not want to fall. They surrender easily. But i hope i won't be like that.

I'm not a quitter. I'll learn. Just give me times, and let me learn.

I'm not a quitter. I'll fall sometimes, i know. But it was one of my way to learn something.

Learning by doing.
Learning by example.
Learning by mistakes.
Learning by observation.
I'll use everything to help me with learning the learning process.

Learning is process, as people said, Rome was not built in one day, so that learning.
May God give me strength to be tough on this learning process.

SEMANGAT!

letter from me

2008-02-10T19:14:00.000+08:00

Dear nyonyah, cempreng, anak kecil, lemot, dan slebor,

My dears, how are you guys? I just opened my photo albums, looking around on Brisbane's folder. And you know what i found? A lot of our pictures! So much of our pictures on many occasions. Ekka, bbq, lebaran, puasa, pajamas party, toscanis, you named it. Then suddenly i become sentimental. I really miss those times. I really miss the times when we can do all those silly things together, how we survive Brisbane together, how we always at each other for better for worse. Only God know how much i miss us in the old times.

However, i know that things always change. It is time for us to be a grown up. It's time for us to move on, to achieve whatever we want achieve, to reach all of our dreams. Now we have to face the reality. We have to face the fact that we are all got busy in Jakarta. Nyonyah, cempreng, slebor, and me with our jobs. Lemot with the wedding plans. And anak kecil with her new profession, a job seeker. We all busy. But, deep inside we support each other. Don't you agree?

Sometimes i also blame it on Jakarta though. How we live apart. Spread all over Jakarta. It's getting difficult to gather us in one place at one time.

Busy, time, and place. Huh! Sucks.

Well, anyway. I write this letter only to say how much you guys are meaning to me. Your friendship has made my life so much easier, so much brighter. I have a new perspective of what's friends are for. Friends not always have the same interest, the same looks, or the same personality. Look at us! The six of us are so different! You guy's realize that don't you?

Then, one things that i always said that we are beyond friends, we are family. I'd always like to call you guys as a second family. I have friends, best friends, and second family.

You know what, i don't have to be worry being alone, cause i know: i have you as my back up, as my guardian angels.

We don't need to say words like i love you or i miss you everyday. Cause we prove it on the real life. That we always there for each other. For better for worse.

I have so much things to say actually, but i know words can not describe my feelings to you guys.

I love you guys, really, even when i am not showing it.

regards,
Putri aka putra

yes, we can.

2008-02-09T10:52:00.000+08:00

by will.i.am

Lyrics:
It was a creed written into the founding documents that declared the destiny of a nation.

Yes we can.

It was whispered by slaves and abolitionists as they blazed a trail toward freedom.

Yes we can.

It was sung by immigrants as they struck out from distant shores and pioneers who pushed westward against an unforgiving wilderness.

Yes we can.

It was the call of workers who organized; women who reached for the ballots; a President who chose the moon as our new frontier; and a King who took us to the mountaintop and pointed the way to the Promised Land.

Yes we can to justice and equality.

Yes we can to opportunity and prosperity.

Yes we can heal this nation.

Yes we can repair this world.

Yes we can.

We know the battle ahead will be long, but always remember that no matter what obstacles stand in our way, nothing can stand in the way of the power of millions of voices calling for change.

We have been told we cannot do this by a chorus of cynics...they will only grow louder and more dissonant ........... We've been asked to pause for a reality check. We've been warned against offering the people of this nation false hope.

But in the unlikely story that is America, there has never been anything false about hope.

Now the hopes of the little girl who goes to a crumbling school in Dillon are the same as the dreams of the boy who learns on the streets of LA; we will remember that there is something happening in America; that we are not as divided as our politics suggests; that we are one people; we are one nation; and together, we will begin the next great chapter in the American story with three words that will ring from coast to coast; from sea to shining sea --

Yes. We. Can. (Obama, 2008)

----

I was so amazed with this video. How Americans are willing to change, are willing to build their nation again.

Would you do the same thing? Would you care enough to build our nation or you just want to fulfill your ego?

So my fellow friends, ".... ask not what your country can do for you — ask what you can do for your country." (Kennedy, 1961)

jaim

2008-02-08T23:43:00.000+08:00

When you meet a new people, a new crowd, which one do you choose: take care of image (or jaim) or simply let people know who you are from the beginning?

lucky and blessed

2008-02-07T22:08:00.000+08:00

Call yourself lucky, if you have home and place where you can stay.
Call yourself lucky, if you can choose your menu for today's breakfast, lunch, dinner, and probably meal.
Call yourself lucky if you can buy a new clothes once in a while.
Call yourself lucky if you can hang out and drink a coffee.

But call yourself blessed if you have family, second family, and friends who always support you whenever you need it.

---

I've been blessed.

I have a great family, a very supportive big family.

I have a beautiful second family, a very lovable second family.
People whom you can say that you don't have to tied by blood to have a family.
Si nyoyah, si slebor, si cempreng, si lemot, dan si anak kecil.
Place where i can relax and make me realize that i have to enjoy life.
Life is too beautiful to miss.

Then i have friends who understand what i'm talking about.
The one who shared the same dreams, the same passions.
The one who always give the opinion no matter what.
The one who won't hold you back.
And losing them, or not able no meet them in a quite long time can make you feel lonely.

So you, my dear friend, good luck on your new journey.
May God always bless you.

turn back time

2008-02-05T21:21:00.000+08:00

If only i could turn back time
If only i had said what i still hide
If only i could turn back time
I would stay for the night. For the night..
(Turn Back Time - Aqua)

Do you realize that sometimes (or probably always) you always want to turn back time?
There's always part of you that wanted to go back, and probably corrected your mistakes?

Or maybe you just want the easy part?
When you already work, you wanted to be a college student again.
when you were in collage, you wanted to be a high school student again.
When you were in high school, you wanted to be a junior high school again.
even when you were in elementary school, you wanted to be a kindergarten student!

And the funny part is, when you didn't want to turn back time, you want to fast forward it.
You can't wait to have children.
You can't wait to get married.
You can't wait to get a job.
You can't wait to graduate from college.
You can't wait to graduate from high school.

See, i told you.. Life is funny.

But really, if you can turn back time, what will you do?

freaky friday

2008-02-01T19:34:00.000+08:00

Life is a bitch, get used to it.

----

Saying good bye is never easy. I don't like saying good bye, i just like to say "see you next time". It because we never know what's gonna happened in the future. It's not a good bye, and it's absolutely not a farewell.

I'll see you next time, and we won't know when is it gonna be.

Just let it flow, and let the life and the time itself play with us.

-----

Leaving your comfort zone was never easy, but you know what's best to you. You know what to do when you have to leave it. Detached yourself, don't get too attached. Love the job, don't love the environment. Cause when you love the environment, you'll be stuck forever.

You will meet new environment, heck, you will meet your old environment. Keep in touch with your past environment, because they were part of your life, they have enriched your life, and clearly they added your lesson about life.

----

What to do in new environment? You'll learn.

Learning by doing. Learning by watching. As simple as that.

----

Let it flow. Let the life brings the new things to you. Don't be afraid, cause there's nothing to afraid of.

In the end, you'll learn. And you'll know when you already got the lesson.

trying and learning

2008-01-14T22:19:00.000+08:00

i'm trying to fly right now.
spread my wings and learning to fall.

i'm learning to know the world now.
explore everything and figuring out what i want to do.

please don't hold me back.
please let me try and let me fall.

in the way, just let me fly.

ketika gengsi mengalahkan segalanya

2008-01-09T23:26:00.000+08:00

Pernah nggak sih kamu punya rasa gengsi yang besar sekali dan itu mempengaruhi ego kamu sedemikian rupa?

What will you do then?

Kenapa yah susah sekali menghilangkan gengsi, mbok yah nerimo dikit. Rendahkan dirimu dan ratakan dirimu. Mulai segala sesuatu dari diri sendiri. Huh.. Saying something is much easier then doing it.

Dan kadang, gengsi juga jadi nyaru sama rasa malas.

Tambah gawat deh.

the new year, the new me?

2008-01-08T21:07:00.000+08:00

I know it's already late, but i still want to say:

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2008!!
may this year brings all the joy that we always wanted
may this year brings all the hope that we shared
may this year be memorable for all of us
may this year become your year, and my year

Things i learned last year:
1. Bahwa jika kita pasrah kepada yang diatas dalam mengerjakan sesuatu, maka hati kita akan menjadi lebih tenang dan tidak berpikir macam-macam, sehingga hasilnya pun akan maksimal.
2. A bit contradiction with number 1, is that if we fight and have a litlle faith, we will gain what we always wanted.
3. JALANI SAJA APA YANG ADA, bersihkan hati, sucikan pikiran, always be positive, it will make your life much brighter.
4. THIS IS YOUR LIFE, YOUR DECISION. Inilah waktunya untuk saya melepaskan diri dari orang-orang terdekat, dalam artian, sekarang saya harus bisa menentukan pilihan saya sendiri, dan itu harus dari saya sendiri, bukan dari orang lain.
5. Jangan pernah menyesali apa yang telah terjadi, semua itu hanya bisa dijadikan pelajaran.
6. Jika kamu berbuat kesalahan, orang pertama yang harus bisa memaafkannya adalah diri kamu sendiri. Karena, terkadang ada kalanya kamu sendiri tidak bisa memaafkan kesalahan kamu sendiri.
7. Mulailah segala sesuatunya dari diri sendiri, kesadaran harus datang dari diri, bukan dari orang lain.
8. And probably many more, i easily forgot hei!

RESOLUTION 2008

1. Start my day with a smile and positive attitude. If you start smiling, then everybody will smiling too!
2. Think positive, bersihkan hati, dan jaga pikiran.
3. FINDING A SETTLE JOB, you don't say daily workers as permanent job right?
4. Gathered up my friends, from junior high to university friend. I bet it's gonna be awesome to meet them again hei!
5. Finding my passion! What's you want to do Putri?
6. Turunkan berat badan. Hahaha.. 7 Kg? Try it!
7. OLAHRAGA!! Jaga kesehatan.
8. Start searching for scholarships! Katanya mo S-2 put.
9. Learning more about life, try it, experience it!
10. Boyfriend? Interesting.
11. Enjoy the life. Enjoy myself.

happy new year guys, good luck with your own resolutions.

it's been a long time

2007-11-16T21:54:00.000+08:00

it's been a long time since i wrote the last post. there's so much to tell, but i was too lazy to write it up.

So, what's new with me?

Well, after finally graduated from UI and of course UQ, now i am facing the new reality. Which is, as we know it, reality is suck. Hohoho..

I have to face for being an unemployed, which is kinda fun. But now i am too bored. So what did i do to kill my time? I become a driver and an assistant for my family.

Hua. Bored!

the loss

2007-08-11T23:39:00.000+08:00

Sekitar 2 minggu yang lalu, saya kehilangan oom saya. Tidak secara mendadak (walaupun rasanya tetap saja mengejutkan) dan mungkin membuat saya dan keluarga sebenarnya bisa menyiapkan diri, tapi tetap saja rasa tidak percaya itu masih ada.

Honestly, it was the first time i loss my close member of my big family. And really, i didn't know what to expect, and what to feel. Saya sedih, tapi saya tidak nangis atau menitikkan air mata. Yang ada di pikiran saya cuma satu: bagaimana jika saya berada di posisi sepupu saya.

Saya bingung. I didn't know what to do at that time. Disaat sepupu2 saya menitikkan air mata, saya malah bengong. I just felt empty. The fact that i'm so lousy in handling people's crying worsened the situation. All i did is hug them.

And you know what's funny. I did cry a bit after i read Harry Potter: The Deathly Hallow, but i did not cry at all during the funeral. How freak is that!

Dan sampe sekarang saya masih tidak tahu. Tidak tahu apa yang akan saya lakukan jika ada anggota keluarga yang meninggalkan saya lagi.

regrets

2007-08-11T23:07:00.000+08:00

Pernah gak menyesali beberapa keputusan yang kamu ambil selama ini?

Saya sering.

Saya sering menyesali keputusan saya. Terkadang keputusan itu saya ambil secara impulsive, hanya menuruti nafsu tanpa memikirkan panjang, secara terburu-buru. Jadinya: menyesal deh.

Saya sering berfikir, ya sudahlah ya.. Dijalanin saja, tapi terkadang tidak mempan. Saya masih tetap memikirkannya. Dan hasilnya: saya tidak bisa move on. Stuck in the moment.

There's a time that i want to push the rewind button to turn back the time. To change my decisions and do the things that i want to do after i think about it, after i analyzed it. But then, in the end i know that i was running away. I do not want to get any responsible from what i have done, or what i have decided.

And now, i'm in the process of learning. Learning to accept my decision and how to be responsible to it.

I choose who i want to be. And i want to be the responsible one. There's no time to regret my decisions. Use it as a learning process. Learning by doing. Learning by experience. Learning from the mistakes. All i need is the courage to face the reality and be it. Life is scary, so get used to it.

I don't want any regrets. All i want is..

freedom.
happiness.
companionship.
passion.
comfort.
and a truly me.

congratulations

2007-07-16T21:47:00.000+08:00

so, 4 years huh?

we started it together.
and we finished it together.

and finally we're here.

after all the hard works.
after all the obstacles.
after all the fight with blood and tears.

this is it.

it is the end of our journey in uni.

do you remember when we all first met?
we all are the cocky guys who just graduated from high school. have no idea what we're going through.

then do you remember our time in Brisbane? and how was it like when we started the class?
it was excited, yet scary.
bet you guys are agree that we have a very good time at there right? hell, we all got our so-called-brisbanesick after we got back for good.

and do you remember when we're doing skripsi?
big no for that.
but we did it. we finally did it.
we fight together. and we survived through all those stuff, together.

it's all like a dream.
and finally we got what we deserved.

now we can be proud using all of our titles.
Bachelors of Arts in Psychology, Sarjana Psikologi.

Putri Nurhayati, B.A., S.Psi.

thank you guys..

for the solidarity.
for the togetherness.
for the experiences.
for the joys.
for the memories.
for the hugs.
and for the love.

congratulations my dear fellow classmates.

it's time to face the real world.

keep in touch. and take care.

God always bless.
and i'll be here when you need me, as always.

to fight, and to have faith.

2007-06-27T20:43:00.000+08:00

this is it.

the time has come my friend.

time to make one of my dream come true.
time to make all my handwork worthed.

the battle of the year. the judgment day.
it's me versus them.

will they help me?
or will they let me down?

all i know is that i have two things on my mind.

to fight.
and to have faith.

wish me luck guys.

let's hope this will be the last, for now.

the future

2007-06-21T22:27:00.000+08:00

I was smiling like a crazy throughout the day, well not all day long though. Definitely after 4 pm.

I just realize, time's fly easily mate.

Step by step, we face the world.
One by one, we move on with our live.

And this time, we have to say goodbye to the "brisbanesick" completely.

No more wondering around about "what if" or "what could".
It's all about changing.

We just have to face the future. We just have to face the reality.

Congratulations to you, who already move on. I'll be there soon.

friends and skripsi

2007-06-17T00:00:00.000+08:00

And when I see you then I know it will be next to me
And when I need you then I know you will be there with me
I'll never leave you...
Just need to get closer... closer..
Lean on me now... Lean on me now..
Closer... Closer...
Lean on me now... Lean on me now...
(Closer - Travis)

I'll be at your side, there's no need to worry
Together we'll survive through the haste and hurry
I'll be at your side
If you feel like you're alone, and you've nowhere to turn
I'll be at your side
(At your side - The Corrs)

I'll be there for you
When the rain starts to pour
I"ll be there for you
Like I've been there before
I'll be there for you
Couse you're there for me too...
(I'll be there for you - The Rembrants)

The smile on your face
Let me know that you need me
There's a truth in your eyes saying you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me
Whenever i fall
You say it best.. When you say nothing at all
(Nothing at all - Ronan Keating)

Ill stand by you
Ill stand by you
Wont let nobody hurt you
Ill stand by you
Take me in, into your darkest hour
And Ill never desert you
Ill stand by you
(I'll stand by you - The Pretenders)

And yet, sometimes all you need is your friends.

with their "ears".
with their hugs.
with their wishes.
and with their loves.

One good things from skripsi: you'll get closer to your classmates.

My current project: SKRIPSI.
My next month project: SIDANG.
My upcoming project: yearbook, FINDING A JOB, arisan, and HAVE FUN.

nb: untuk nyonyah, ini duka kita yah nyah!

shine - take that

2007-04-14T10:38:00.000+08:00

Shine - Take That

You, you're such a big star to me
You're everything I wanna be
But you're stuck in a hole and I want you to get out
I don't know what there is to see
But I know it's time for you to leave
We're all just pushing along
Trying to figure it out, out, out.

All your anticipation pulls you down
When you can have it all, you can have it all.

So come on, come on, get it on
Don't know what you're waiting for
Your time is coming don't be late, hey hey
So come on
See the light on your face
Let it shine
Just let it shine
Let it shine.

Stop being so hard on yourself
It's not good for your health
I know that you can change
So clear your head ang come round
You only have to open your eyes
You might just get a big surprise
And it may feel good and you might want to smile, smile, smile.

Don't you let your demons pull you down
'Cause you can have it all, you can have it all.

Hey let me know you
You're all that matters to me
Hey let me show you
You're all that matters to me.

Hey let me love you
You're all that matters to me
Hey so come on yeah
Shine all your light over me.

vulnerable

2007-03-13T11:22:00.000+08:00

"None of us wanted to say what we were thinking: How vulnerable we felt. So we all just stood around, pretending to work, and waited for someone to come through that door and tell us how this was gonna end." (Dorian, 2005) - Taken from Scrubs

Saya yakin, mungkin hampir 90% dari teman-teman saya akan bilang kalau saya ini termasuk cewek yang tough. Baik teman dekat maupun teman yang baru kenal. Itu juga mungkin kebanyakan berdasarkan apa yang mereka lihat, dalam artian: penampilan saya. Saya memang suka memakai jeans dan kaos. Santai dan terlihat tomboy. Dan kebanyakan dari mereka pasti akan bilang kalau saya ini mandiri dan galak! Hahaha.. Makanya mereka bilang saya tough.

Tapi, deep down inside, saya sedang bingung dengan diri saya sendiri. Saya tahu, sekalinya saya cerita kebanyakan dengan mereka tidak percaya dengan cerita saya. Mereka mengharapkan melihat saya yang tough, bukan saya yang tiba-tiba jadi sedikit bingung. No one seems can understand me.

Dan saya, saya tidak suka menceritakan masalah saya kepada orang lain. Extrovert in the outside, introvert in the inside though. Mungkin seperti yang JD katakan, saya tidak mau terlihat vulnerable di mata orang. Betapa saya ingin menunjukan kalau "i'm ok" pada saat saya tidak ok.

I know that i have a lot of friends. And i can call them everytime i want.

But for now, i feel empty. and lonely. and it feels like a s*it.

berani berbuat.. berani bertanggung jawab..

2007-02-22T22:31:00.000+08:00

Kemarin ini, saya sempat bertemu dengan beberapa teman sma. Kami berkumpul dan saling menceritakan kabar terbaru. Tidak lupa juga kita bergosip bersama. Hehehe.. Mungkin bukan bergosip, tapi saling mencari tahu kabar teman-teman SMA yang lain. Berita yang paling membuat saya terbengong mungkin adalah mengenai salah satu teman saya yang memutuskan untuk menjadi single parent. Wow! Saya salut! Disaat banyak orang seumuran saya masih bermain-main ria, dia sudah berani bertanggung jawab. Dia berani bertanggung jawab atas perbuatannya. Katanya sih cowoknya tidak mau bertanggung jawab dan menolak menikahinya, dan dia pun tidak mau melakukan tindakan aborsi. Dan hasilnya: she's a mom now.

Saya salut sama dia, karena dia berani menjadi single parent.
Zaman sekarang memang lucu dan aneh. Terutama masyarakat kita. Ok. Kita memang masih mempunyai adat timur, tapi tidak bisa dipungkiri kalau pengaruh barat sudah begitu berpengaruh pada kehidupan kita. Salah satunya adalah sex before married atau dulu dikenal sebagai free sex. Mungkin istilah free sex udah gak cocok kali yah. Dulu kan orang beranggapan free sex adalah sex bebas, dimana kalo di luar sana itu ditandakan dengan berhubungan seks dengan banyak orang. Sementara kalau di Indonesia, free sex itu kalau orang having sex before married. Jadi apa yah istilah enaknya? Well, let's just said i still called it as free sex.

Mungkin beberapa dari kita masih mempunyai pikiran kuno dan menganggap itu adalah hal yang tabu. Sementara yang lainnya? Hmm.. Mungkin itu sudah biasa kali yah. Buktinya: bukannya melarang free sex, pemerintah malah menganjurkan orang memakai kondom ketika berhubungan seks. Lah, mereka tidak bilang kalau condom hanya untuk pasangan yang sudah menikah loh. Pokoknya mereka hanya menggalakan pemakaian condom. Kalau menurut saya sih, secara tidak langsung itu sudah "melegalkan" free sex. Hahahaha.. Tidak tahu juga sih. Secara pemerintah sudah gak jelas gitu maunya apa. Hehehe..

Bagi saya, entah zaman yang sudah berubah atau pikiran saya yang semakin berkembang. Dulu waktu sma, saya termasuk anak yang biasa aja. I'm not a nerd but i'm not agj (anak gaul jakarta) juga. Saya masuk ipa yang cukup menguras waktu dan tenaga tapi saya juga punya teman-teman yang bisa diajak gaul. Pada saat itu, saya jarang membicarakan tentang seks. Kenapa yah? Mungkin karena diantara teman-teman dekat saya tidak ada yang tertarik dengan tema itu. Namun setelah saya kuliah dan kemudian pergi ke Australia. Wah, saya merasa seperti orang paling bodoh sedunia kalau sedang membicarakan hal tersebut! Hahahaha.. Mungkin karena itu juga kali yah teman saya membelikan ensiklopedia A to Z about sex sebagai hadiah ulang tahun. Hahahaha... Dulu saya kaget kalau mendengar cerita beberapa orang tentang their sex life, tapi sekarang? Sudah biasa tuh.

I don't give a damn about that. Dulu mungkin saya bisa mengerutkan dahi kalau mendengar cerita itu, sekarang? Saya ikut tertawa-tawa mendengar cerita seperti itu. Free sex, sex before marriage, atau apalah itu namanya.. hanyalah salah satu dari sekian banyak pilihan dalam hidup kita. Toh namanya sex juga diakui sebagai salah satu kebutuhan. Hihihihi.. Kadang saya suka geli loh kalo baca tabloid gosip atau menonton infotainment dimana masih banyak selebritis yang mengaku kalau keperawanan sangat penting. Hahahaha.. Bullshit! Mungkin masih ada orang yang percaya kali yah, sementara saya? Saya hanya tertawa geli karena saya terkadang suka tahu soal gosip their real sex life. Hahahahahaha.. Yah namanya orang, mana ada sih yang mau terlihat buruk? Woops. Tunggu deh, jadi.. Apakah virginitas itu masih penting?

Kalau menurut masyarakat kita yang suka "sok" memiliki moral, mungkin hal tersebut masih penting. Tapi kenapa virginitas identik dengan perempuan sih. Sebel! Bukannya sebel gimana. Tapi, kalau cewek sudah tidak virgin dibilang bukan cewek baik-baik, lalu kenapa cowok yang tidak virgin didiamkan saja? Huh.. Masyarakat pilih kasih euy. Kadang mereka (masyarakat atau orang-orang) hanya bilang: "namanya juga cowok, nafsunya gede". Lah, emang cewek gak punya nafsu apa? Ok. Kalau mereka menganggap virginitas penting untuk cewek. Saya akan bilang juga, virginitas juga penting buat cowok. Jadi kalau ada cowok yang udah gak virgin bilang kalau mereka gak mau sama cewek yang udah gak virgin, saya akan timpuk kepalannya. Idiih, kayak sok suci. Memangnya ada orang seperti itu? Ada aja lah. Di dunia ini apa sih yang nggak ada?

Ok. Balik lagi ke teman saya yang memutuskan untuk menjadi single parent. Atau teman yang married by accident. I'm not here to judge. I'm here to give my applause. Hebat. Berani berbuat, berani bertanggung jawab. Walau itu mungkin untuk teman saya yang cewek itu yah, bukan untuk cowoknya. Cowoknya sih pasti hanyalah satu dari sekian banyak cowok-cowok brengsek yang tidak mau bertanggung jawab. Jarang loh ada yang mau menjadi single parent. Apalagi di Indonesia dimana orang-orang masih merasa "moral" itu sangatlah penting. Aduh, pada muna deh. Jangan sok gitu deh. Jangan pada lari dari kenyataan, kenyataaan kalau Indonesia sudah berubah, tepatnya: masyarakat Indonesia sudah berubah. Hargai keputusan orang yang mau menjadi single parent. Jangan malah mencibir mereka. Dukung mereka, karena itu adalah pilihan hidup mereka.

Sedikit loncat. Pada saat kuliah dulu, saya pernah membaca kurang lebih begini: "Survey membuktikan kalau remaja itu menolak mengunakan pengaman pada saat berhubungan seks. Kenapa? Karena menurut mereka kalau tidak ada resikonya maka seks itu akan terasa kurang seru. Jadi, semakin tinggi resiko nya, semakin nikmat seks itu sendiri." Hahahaha.. Awalnya saya tertawa membacanya, tapi begitu saya menceritakannya kepada teman, mereka malah bilang memang itulah kenyataannya. Aduh zaman sekarang memang ada-ada saja!

the best

2007-02-11T14:40:00.000+08:00

"Sometimes the best thing is not always the right thing." (taken from Dunia Mereka 2)

Sometimes, what we thought would be the best thing for other people is not always the right thing for them.
Sometimes, we know that we want they got the best, but then, the best according to yourself is not the same with the best according to them.

Terkadang mungkin kita memang terlihat seperti mencampuri urusan orang lain. Kita selalu mengatakan kalau kita hanya mau mereka mendapatkan yang terbaik untuk mereka. Tapi ada kalanya kita juga harus tahu kalau, kalau yang terbaik buat mereka menurut kita belum tentu mereka anggap yang terbaik untuk mereka.

Terkadang, mungkin kita merasa paling tau solusi untuk masalah orang lain. Tapi, apakah solusi yang terbaik itu adalah sesuatu yang benar? Baik tidak sama dengan benar.

Deal with your ego first, then deal with others problems.

a poem for you

2007-02-10T10:34:00.000+08:00

It's a poem by e.e. Cummings.
             
"I carry your heart with me.                
I carry it in my heart.
I am never without it.
Anywhere I go, you go, my dear.
And whatever is done by only me...
is your doing, my darling.
I fear no fate...
for you are my fate, my sweet.
I want no world, for, beautiful...
you are my world, my true.
Here is the deepest secret
no one knows
Here is the root of the root...    
and the bud of the bud...
and the sky of the sky
of a tree called life...
which grows higher
than the soul can hope...
or mind can hide.
It is the wonder
that's keeping the stars apart.
I carry your heart.
I carry it in my heart."

(taken from In Her Shoes)

p.s: only God know how much i miss you dear, and only God know how i much i love you guys.
I dedicated this poem only for you, for my dearest second family whereever you are.

wish you all the very best

2007-02-01T22:45:00.000+08:00

Sekarang saya percaya, saying something in the right moment itu memang benar dan besar pengaruhnya. Terkadang kata yang diucapkan sangatlah simple, tapi karena kita mengucapkannya di saat yang tepat, pengaruhnya jadi terasa sekali bagi orang tersebut.

Baru-baru ini seorang teman berterima kasih pada saya. Dia berterima kasih karena suatu hal yang simple. All i did was just saying: "all the very best for you". Pada saat itu saya sedang graduation di UQ. Seharusnya dia juga, tapi karena ada beberapa kendala, kelulusannya jadi tertunda. Saya sendiri sudah lupa mengatakan hal tersebut pada dia. Tapi rupanya karena pada saat itu dia sedang bersedih di tengah kebahagian orang lain (halah bahasanya!), sebuah kalimat itu membuatnya senang. Sedikit sentimentil memang, tapi dia senang sekali mendengarnya. Dan sangat berterima kasih karenanya.

Aaarrhh.. Saya jadi senang.. Di tengah ke-suka-dodol-an saya dalam berkata dan merusak moment (menurut beberapa orang), ternyata saya juga bisa membuat seseorang terharu. Hahaha..

Lalu, lepas dari cerita diatas. Terkadang saya suka geli sendiri. Nampaknya "my second family" (yes, you know who) suka takut kalau dengar saya sedang "mengomentari" masalah mereka. Hahaha.. Emangnya saya menyeramkan yah teman? Sampai-sampai kalian takut sekali membuat saya marah. Padahal, kamu tahu kan kalau saya hanya menginginkan yang terbaik buat diri kalian?

Well, in the end, as i said, "wish you all the very best" (and yes, that was my favorite sentence).

knowing someone

2007-01-21T19:10:00.000+08:00

there's a time..
there's a time when you feel that you know your friends or people around you inside outside.
you feel that you know them very well. you know everything about them, from a to z.
you said to everybody that you know their habit and you claim that they are your best bud and you know their secret.

but the fact is,

everybody has secrets, even the dark ones. the ones that they want to keep it privately.
there will be something that you won't know. and just let it as a secret.

everybody has their own thoughts, their own decisions.
kita bisa bilang kalau kita bakal tahu keputusan orang terdekat kita, karena kita merasa mengenal mereka. tapi, apakah selalu begitu?
ada kalanya kita mendapatkan kejutan dari orang tersebut.

apakah itu karena kita "kurang mengenal" orang tersebut?
apakah itu karena semua orang dengan mudahnya berubah?

brisbanesick

2007-01-11T20:21:00.000+08:00

"when one door of happiness shuts, other will open if you make yourself see it"

Aaarrrggghhh.. Sebel! Kemarin saya membuat post panjang lebar tentang ini tapi ternyata tidak ke-update karena blogger maintanance. Bete!

Saya jadi kehilangan mood untuk membahasnya deh. Maklum, rada lupa. Hehe..

Anyway, beberapa minggu kemarin saya sedang terkena brisbanesick. Penyakit baru sejenis homesick, cuma bedanya ini saya kangen Brisbane. Bukan, saya bukan kangen teman-teman saya (walaupun saya kangen my second family) karena saya tahu mereka semua akan kembali ke Jakarta suatu saat nanti, tapi saya kangen dengan hidup saya disana.

Kangen tidur pagi dan bangun siang.
Kangen begadang karena tugas ataupun hanya sekedar mengobrol dengan kedua housemates saya (si nyonyah mami util kitel dan si pating slebor hua-hua us-us) yang aneh itu. Hehe..
Kangen makan 2x sehari (dan kebanyakan diisi dengan indomie).
Kangen dengan microwave yang membuat hidup saya terasa mudah. Mau indomie tinggal dimasukkan kedalam microwave selama 5 menit.
Kangen dengan kompor listrik yang panasnya lama banget.
Kangen minum langsung dari keran.
Kangen mandi 1x sehari (jorok? bodo deh. hemat air! kan Queensland lagi water restriction. Haha..)
Kangen rebutan air panas with my housemates di saat winter.
Kangen dengan rumah saya yang suka kotor dan berantakan.
Kangen dengan ruang tv yang menjadi kesukaan semua orang.
Kangen dengan dapur yang jorok dan membuat males masak (atau merasa sayang untuk mengotorinya karena baru saja dibersihkan).
Kangen mencuci baju dan kemudia menjemurnya (plus menjemur pakaian dalam yang seabrek) di beranda.
Kangen menonton dvd dan terus ketiduran bersama si util dan si hua-hua.
Kangen belanja bulanan bersama si util dan si hua-hua dan pastinya setiap kita belanja ada aja ceritanya.
Kangen dengan meja makan di rumah yang panjang banget. Berisikan full makanan setiap unit saya bikin acara. Buka puasa? Lebaran? You named it.
Kangen main ke 41 dan bertemu dengan si cempreng, si lemot, dan si anak kecil.
Kangen bercerita bersama mereka kapan saja dan dimana saja.
Kangen rutinitas kami ber-6: Toscani's dan southbank.
Kangen diinepin sama mereka dan tidur bersama di ruang tv empet-emepetan.
Kangen bermain board game bersama. Ada yang janji untuk membersihkan dapur tuh.
Kangen ngumpul dengan anak-anak 2003.
Kangen belajar bersama. Walau seringkali gak ngerti juga. Haha..
Kangen kuliah! Bertemu lecturer dan tutor yang pinter-pinter dan canggih-canggih.
Kangen jalan kaki ke kampus. Walau ngomel karena jauh (berlebihan) tapi enak karena pemandangannya yang keren.
Kangen UQ!
Kangen tiduran di great court.
Kangen library untuk mencari inspirasi! Betah disana sampe malam walaupun sering juga ketiduran.
Kangen makan di refectory walaupun rasanya biasa aja.
Kangen ngumpul bareng anak-anak di lolly.
Kangen kerja di childcare. Tepatnya kangen anak-anak childcare: Annie, Maisie, Edward, Maya, Rita, Kieran, Milly, Maritza, Toby, Sarah, Portia, Harry, Paulie, Willy, Zara, Sian, Guy, Melody, Darcy, Vicky, Ashton, Olivia, ...
Kangen ruangan kampus yang canggih.
Kangen mampir ke kantornya Astrid.
Kangen naik 412. Dengan jadwalnya yang selalu teratur dan busnya yang besar.
Kangen naik citycat dan ketiduran di dalamnya.
Kangen naik kereta yang biar lama tapi nyaman.
Kangen city. Tidak hanya untuk belanja, tapi untuk sekedar jalan-jalan.
Kangen indoroopilly. Tempat yang enak untuk belanja juga.
Kangen toowong.
Kangen St. Lucia pastinya. Biar suburbs tapi nyaman.
Kangen city beach, sports girl, myer, general pants, ...
Kangen hungry jacks, himawari, pancake, ...
Kangen makan di hawken drive.
Kangen gold coast.
Kangen udara bersih, awan biru, rumput hijau.
Kangen BBQan. Baik itu di manors, southbank, atau roma.
Kangen ....
Kangen ....
Kangen ....
Banyak ah yang dikangenin!!

am i happy

2007-01-09T23:19:00.000+08:00

Last night, i read a sentence from one of Sitta Karnia's novel.

"When one door of happiness shuts, other will open if you make yourself see it."

saying good bye

2006-12-19T12:13:00.000+08:00

i'm saying good bye to brisbane.

2006-12-10T20:05:00.000+08:00

living in a dream.

i feel lost.

graduation equal to mood swing.

happy or sad.
in a crowd or to be alone.
privacy or comfort.
it's your choice.

remember: it's your life, it's your decision.

euphoria

2006-12-02T00:24:00.000+08:00

euphoria.

realization.

different expectations.
different opinions.
different hopes.
different behaviors.
different interests.
different thoughts.

maturity is a key.
growing up is the process.
and time will answer that.

Alhamdulillah

2006-11-28T23:19:00.000+08:00

Alhamdulillah. Saya lulus.
Alhamdulillah. Saya bisa graudation semester ini.

aaarhh

2006-11-15T10:07:00.000+08:00

ok.. here's the thing.

nilai gw keluar tanggal 29 nov. graduation 4 des. mepet. kalo gw gak lulus gimana?

sekarang dosen gak boleh ngeluarin nilai sebelum tanggal 29 nov. kan gw penasaran mampus.

ternyata buat balik back for good tuh banyak yah urusannya. duit mulu deh keluar! bokek donk gw.

intinya: doain gw yah!

All you need is love

2006-11-08T21:11:00.000+08:00

All you need is love - The Beatles

Love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love.

There's nothing you can do that can't be done.
Nothing you can sing that can't be sung.
Nothing you can say but you can learn how to play the game
It's easy.

There's nothing you can make that can't be made.
No one you can save that can't be saved.
Nothing you can do but you can learn how to be in time
It's easy.

All you need is love, all you need is love,
All you need is love, love, love is all you need.
Love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love.
All you need is love, all you need is love,
All you need is love, love, love is all you need.

There's nothing you can know that isn't known.
Nothing you can see that isn't shown.
Nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be.
It's easy.

All you need is love, all you need is love,
All you need is love, love, love is all you need.
All you need is love (all together now)
All you need is love (everybody)
All you need is love, love, love is all you need.

monster..

2006-11-08T15:28:00.000+08:00

"We don't have to be a monster to beat a monster." (Bono, 2006).

kacau

2006-11-07T13:36:00.000+08:00

eh eh.. kacau deh.. saya belum belajar!! ujian memang masih tanggal 10 dan 11.. tapi tetap saja materi yang harus saya baca ada banyak!! tidak..

sekarang pikiran saya malah melayang ke u2.. hahahaha..

saya mo nonton konser u2 nanti malam.. hore.. hore..

di jakarta gak ada konser u2 yah?? hahahaha

ujian.. ujia..

2006-11-06T08:06:00.000+08:00

selamat pagi..

saya mau ujian nih siang ini.. doakan yah. deg2an euy!

putri - the update

2006-11-03T21:38:00.000+08:00

kalau dipikir-pikir, siapa juga gw meng-update berita tentang diri sendiri. tapi berhubung gw lagi sampai di satu titik yang super duper mega ultra jenuh, ya udah lah ya.. sotoy sedikit, sok update berita tentang diri sendiri.

pertama: ini semester terakhir saya di UQ loh. penting? penting sekali. karena tanggal 18 Desember nanti saya insyaAllah akan back for good ke Jakarta. doakan yah!

kedua: saya sudah bilang kan kalau saya kehilangan emotional push? nah, sampai sekarang masih hilang. jadinya saya malas sekali belajar. gawat nih! padahal saya senin ada final exam. sekali lagi saya minta doanya yah! doa kalian ditambah usaha saya (walau pas2an) insyaAllah bisa membuahkan hasil. hahahaha..

ketiga: kemarin lebaran, saya dan housemate mengadakan open house loh. rame!! tamu datang dan pergi. ada kali 60 - 70 orang. Alhamdulillah makanan habis, jadi kita tidak kebingungan menghabiskan makanan yang berlebih itu. senang? tentu saja senang. semua senang dan perut pun kenyang.

keempat: tahu tidak ada finalis Australian Idol yang keturunan Indonesia. Namanya Jessica Mauboy. Coba seandainya orang yang di Indo bisa ikut sms dia. Hahahaha..

Kelima: mama papa saya mau datang! cihuy! semoga dapat visa dan tidak ada halangan. dan semoga saya bisa graduation semester ini. again and again, saya tidak lupa untuk meminta doanya.

Keenam: saya punya segudang rencana menghabiskan hari2 terakhir di Brisbane. nonton konser U2, nonton sirkus, nonton opera, belanja, liburan ke frasier island. kya.. habis donk duit saya! tidak..

Ketujuh: Brisbane mulai panas!! apalagi kamar saya! busyet, dah kayak oven. hahahahaha... mengurangi semangat belajar nih --> berlebihan.

Kedelapan: Saya baru tahu kalau salah satu senior saya sekarang kuliah di Oxford. ambil psikologi (ntah itu S2 atau S3). salut!! pintar sekali dia. bukannya masuk Oxford susah yah?? (cita2 masuk Oxford atau Harvard, sayang gak kesampaian, yah setidaknya sudah mencicipi UQ lah. hahahaha..)

Kesembilan: i miss my second family!! i miss toscanis!! i miss our quality time.

Kesepuluh: saya masih harus belajar!!! hahahaha..

Kesebelas: dah ah.. gak tau lagi..

sing songs

2006-11-02T12:20:00.000+08:00

Shower the people - James Tylor

You can play the game and you can act out the part
Though you know it wasnt written for you
So tell me, how can you stand there with your broken heart
Ashamed of playing the fool
One thing can lead to another; it doesnt take any sacrifice
Oh, father and mother, sister and brother
If it feels right, then dont think twice

Shower the people you love with love
Show them the way that you feel
Everythings is gonna be alright if you only will

You can run but you cannot hide
This is widely known
And what you plan to do with your foolish heart
When youre all by yourself alone
Once you tell somebody how you really feel
You feel it beginning to ease
I think its true what they say about the squeaky wheel
Always getting the grease.

Better to shower the people you love with love
Show them the way that you feel
Things are gonna be just fine if you only will
What i'd like to sat to you was
Shower the people you love with love
Show them the way that you feel
Things are gonna be alright if you only will

Everytime you cry - Human Nature

Never before have I seen you look so blue
I cant find a cure and nothing comforts you
But the light at the end of the tunnel
Doesnt shine at the end of the day

Every time you cry
Save up all your tears
I will be your rainbow when it disappears
Wash away the pain
til you smile again
I will be the laughter in your eyes
Every time you cry

Time has a way of wounding what has healed
What can I say? I know just how you feel
Your soul is dark and troubled
Like a river running wild

Every time you cry
Save up all your tears
I will be your rainbow when it disappears
Wash away the pain
til you smile again
I will be the laughter in your eyes
Every time you cry

Well, you know thats what Im here for
I will give you what you need, more
There will be no hesitation
I will reap no reward

Every time you cry
Save up all your tears
I will be your rainbow when it disappears
Wash away the pain
til you smile again
I will be the laughter in your eyes
Every time you cry

sorry

2006-10-23T23:54:00.000+08:00

Hei hei..

Selamat merayakan hari kemenangan yah.
Semoga amal ibadah kita di bulan puasa ini diterima di sisi-Nya.

Dan tidak lupa, mohon maaf lahir dan batin. Saya sudah memaafkan dosa kamu dan saya harap kamu memaafkan dosa saya.

regards,
Putri

emotional push

2006-10-21T21:18:00.000+08:00

i lost my emotional push.

can you find it for me?

*proscrastinator mood on*

lost

2006-10-19T17:17:00.000+08:00

you won't know what you lost untill it's gone

Akhirnya - Gigi

2006-10-16T08:49:00.000+08:00

Akhirnya - Gigi

ku sadari akhirnya kerapuhan imanku
telah membawa jiwa dan ragaku
ke dalam dunia yg tak tentu arah

ku sadari akhirnya Kau tiada duanya
tempat memohon beraneka pinta
tempat berlindung dari segala mara bahaya

reff: oh Tuhan mohon ampun
atas dosa dan dosa selama ini
aku tak menjalankan perintahMu
tak pedulikan namaMu
tenggelam melupakan diriMu

oh Tuhan mohon ampun
atas dosa dan dosa sempatkanlah
aku bertobat hidup di jalanmu
tuk penuhi kewajibanku
sebelum tutup usia kembali padaMu
oh kembali padamu ohhh

puasa.. puasa.. sebulan penuh puasa..

2006-09-23T21:25:00.000+08:00

Hei..

Selamat menjalankan ibadah puasa yah (bagi yang menjalankannya)..

Semoga puasa kali ini menjadi berkah buat kita semua..

saya cuma mau bilang

2006-09-15T13:55:00.000+08:00

Untuk kamu-kamu.

Iyah, posting ini special untuk kamu-kamu..
Iyah, kamu-kamu yang saya anggap sebagai my second family disini.
Iyah, kamu-kamu yang biasanya berpergian dengan saya setiap hari minggu.
Iyah, kamu-kamu tempat saya bercerita dan bergosip.
Iyah, kamu-kamu yang bersama dengan saya mempunyai segudang kenangan indah disini.
Iyah, kamu-kamu yang pastinya suka membaca blog saya (jadi malu saya).
Iyah, kamu-kamu yang sekarang sedang saya kangenin karena kita jarang berkumpul bersama.
Iyah, kamu si cempreng, kamu si kitel, kamu si lemot, kamu si slebor, dan kamu si anak kecil.
Pokoknya saya yakin kamu tau siapa kamu.

Saya cuma mau bilang,
Maaf.. Kalau saya suka galak.
Maaf.. Kalau kamu suka menganggap saya tidak terbuka.
Maaf.. Kalau kamu-kamu suka jadi takut sama saya, saya kan tidak akan memakan kamu.
Maaf.. Kalau kamu-kamu jadi harus sabar menghadapi saya dengan segala keanehan saya.
Maaf.. Kalau kamu-kamu menganggap saya suka ikut campur urusan kamu.
Maaf.. Kalau saya suka lemot menangkap cerita dari kamu.
Maaf.. Kalau terkadang saya sangat berbeda pandangan dengan kamu.
Maaf.. Kalau mungkin terkadang saya tidak setuju dengan apa yang kamu lakukan.
Maaf..
Maaf..
Maaf..
Maaf.. Pokoknya sejuta maaf deh kalau saya ada salah sama kamu.

Tau tidak, cerita-cerita dari kamu-kamu akhir ini membuat saya mau bilang..
Saya mau bilang..
Saya cuma mau bilang..
Saya.. Saya cuma mau bilang kalau kamu bisa cerita ke saya tanpa takut sama saya.
Saya.. Saya cuma mau bilang kalau saya selalu ada disini kapanpun kamu butuh saya.
Saya.. Saya cuma mau bilang kalau saya mau kamu memutuskan apa yang terbaik untuk kamu, untuk kamu sendiri. Bukan untuk orang lain.
Saya.. Saya cuma mau bilang kalau saya terkadang tidak suka melihat "orang lain" memperlakukanmu.
Saya.. Saya cuma mau bilang kalau saya mau "orang lain" itu memperlakukan kamu sama seperti kamu memperlakukan mereka.
Saya.. Saya cuma mau bilang kalau tidak selamanya kamu harus berkorban, hidup itu harus take and give.
Saya.. Saya cuma mau bilang apapun yang kamu lakukan saya selalu ada dibelakangmu.
Saya.. Saya cuma mau bilang kalau kamu harus memikirkan diri kamu juga, jangan selalu memikirkan orang lain.
Saya.. Saya cuma mau bilang kalau saya ingin kamu punya sikap.
Saya.. Saya cuma mau bilang kalau kamu itu sudah yang merupakan yang terbaik, dan kamu harusnya puas dengan itu semua.
Saya.. Saya cuma mau bilang ....
Saya.. Saya cuma mau bilang ....
Saya.. Saya cuma mau bilang ....
Saya.. Saya cuma mau bilang kalau saya mau kamu mendapatkan yang terbaik apapun itu.

dan yang penting,
Saya..
Saya..
Saya..
Saya cuma mau bilang kalau saya sayang kamu semua.

opportunity

2006-09-09T12:54:00.000+08:00

Opportunity
Pete Murray

And so it goes another lonely day
Your savin time but your miles away
Your fly was drownin in some bitter tea
For seeing lost opportunity

Find your mirror go and look inside
And see the talent you always hide
Don't go kidd yourself well not today
Satisfaction's not to far away

Hold on now your exits here
It's waiting just for you
Don't pause too long
It's fading now
It's ending all too soon you'll see

Soon you'll see

Your coffee's warm but your milk is sour
Life is short but your here to flower
Dream yourself along another day
Never miss opportunity

Don't be scared of what you cannot see
Your only fear is possibility
Never wonder what the hell went wrong
Your second chance may never come along

Hold on now your exits here
It's waiting just for you
Don't pause too long
It's fading now
It's ending all too soon you'll see

Soon you'll see

Hold on now your exits here
It's waiting just for you
Don't pause too long
It's fading now
It's ending all too soon you'll see

Soon you'll see [x5]

nb: It's so me! This song describes my present conditions. Aaaaarrrhhh..

prime of life

2006-08-31T16:48:00.000+08:00

Here's another questions.. Taken from PSYC 3152 (Applied Topics in Lifespan Development) Tutorial Notebook.

What is the best age for a person to be? Why?
Kalau menurut saya yang notabene baru 21 tahun hidup di dunia, umur 25an kayaknya bakal the best age deh. Soalnya di umur segitu kita *harusnya sudah lulus kuliah, siap kerja, dan siap menghadapi babak baru. Ready for challange and ready to face the world plus having motivation to learn and experience everything.

What is the worst for a person to be? Why?
Kok saya takut umur 60 keatas yah? Takutnya di umur segitu saya sudah merasa tua, tidak bisa ngapa2in, mulai penyakitan, tidak ada kerjaan, dan apakah saya akan merasa kesepian seperti nenek kakek saya? Entahlah. Tapi yang jelas saya takut pikun seperti kakek saya. Hehehe..

What has beem the happiest age period in your life so far? Why?
Hmm.. Kayaknya 4 tahun terakhir ini termasuk masa2 yang menyenangkan kok. Semenjak kuliah. Saya suka sekali masa kuliah ini, terutama kuliah disini. Merasakan kebebasan euy! Dan yang jelas merasa mulai mengatur hidup sendiri.

Has age ever limited your activities or interfered with the satisfaction you were gaining from life? If so, please explain:
Waduh. Selama ini sih tidak ada masalah. Mungkin karena saya masih umur 21. Mungkin yang lebih tua daripada saya lebih bisa memberikan jawaban.

What age period do you look forward to most in the future? Why?
25!! Can't wait till reach that age. Kenapa? Karena di bayangan saya, di umur segitu saya sudah lulus kuliah (maunya sih sudah lulus S-2) dan siap mencari pengalaman kerja.

Do you dread any age period in the future? Why?
Saya takut tua. Hahaha.. Umur 60an lah. Karena seperti alasan yang diatas. Menurut saya itu akan the worst age period. Tapi entahlah, siapa tau saya akan menikmati kehidupan di umur segitu.

What age has been the worst age period in your life so far? Why?
17! Karena saya harus balik lagi ke Jakarta meninggalkan Bali yang indah.

How about you??

usia dan karir

2006-08-27T19:42:00.000+08:00

Satu hal yang paling saya kagumi dari orang-orang disini (Australia atau western people) adalah mereka tidak pernah menganggap usia sebagai suatu batasan. Saya suka kagum sama finalis Australian Idol yang sudah menikah dan mempunyai anak (included single parent) tapi tetap semangat mengejar mimpinya. Tidak memperdulikan usia dan status tapi tetap berusaha memberikan yang terbaik. Atau kagum sama teman2 sekelas saya, yang sudah berkeluarga, yang sudah mempunyai anak, tapi masih semangat mengejar ilmu (as undergraduate students loh) dan tetap memperhatikan keluarga. Atau kagum melihat orang2 yang suka travelling dan berkelana keliling walaupun usia sudah tidak lagi muda. They dedicate themself into their own life, their own decision, without thinking what others say. Saya kagum dengan keputusan mereka, dengan pilihat hidup mereka.

Di Jakarta, kayaknya jarang sekali saya melihat hal tersebut. Mungkin belum ada finalis AFI, Indonesian Idol, atau KDI yang sudah berkeluarga. Bahkan mungkin kalau sudah berkeluarga dianggap sebagai hambatan (merasa diri lebih tua? entahlah). Lalu, jarang sekali saya melihat mahasiswa yang sudah mempunyai anak dan bersekolah bersama-sama di kelas reguler (bukan ekstensi yah). Padahal mempunyai teman yang lebih tua itu sangat menambah wawasan loh. Kemudian, saya jarang melihat orang travelling dan mendedikasikan hidupnya untuk travelling (hua.. impian saya sebenarnya).

Kenapa bisa begitu yah? Di Jakarta, usia orang menikah rata2 25 tahun (kayaknya, walau sekarnag sudah mulai bergeser nampaknya). Sementara disini, menikah bukanlah prioritas utama (secara hidup disini bebas sekali). Kalau kata seorang teman, memang pada dasarnya culture kita berbeda. Di Indonesia, kalau sudah menikah hidup itu otomatis akan didedikasikan untuk keluarga, sementara kalau disini tidak. Akan ke keluarga juga, namun bukan berarti tidak bisa mengejar mimpinya.

Kalau di Indonesia, begitu mempunyai anak rasanya akan malas sekali untuk sekolah lagi (kalau menurut beberapa orang yah). Sementara disini, saya terbengong-bengong melihat anak usia 3 bulan ditinggal ibunya di child care kampus sementara dia sendiri ikut kuliah. Hebat sekali. Saya salut sama dia. Tetep niat cari ilmu euy. Ooh iya, saya juga suka kagum kalau ada mahasiswa yang membawa bayi (umur 3 bulanan) ke kelas. Iyah, ke kelas. Si bayi otomatis ikut kuliah. Lucu sekali.

Anyway, sedikit melenceng.

Saya sekarang sedang volunteer di child care. Tau tidak apa yang dipikiran saya, kalau child care diadakan di kantor2 Jakarta, mungkin akan jarang sekali anak yang diasuh oleh baby sitter. Mungkin lebih baik di child care daripada diasuh oleh baby sitter. Iya gak sih??

grief

2006-08-15T21:13:00.000+08:00

But in the end, the most important thing to accept is that no matter how alone you feel, how painful it may be, with the help of those around you, you'll get through this too.
(Scrubs)

Seorang teman mengatakan kalau "i'm so lausy in handling a crying person". I admit it, i don't like tears. And sometimes i don't know what to do when somebody (especially my best friends) cries. It's not like i'm a bad person, but i just don't want to make them feel worse, feel sadder than ever.

Mungkin, buat saya kalau seseorang menangis, at least dia butuh seseorang untuk membuat dia merasa tenang, merasa aman. Kalau saya ikut nangis, lalu yang bisa menghibur dia siapa? Kalau saya ikut nangis, lalu yang bisa membuat dia merasa tenang siapa?

Mungkin, buat saya, pada saat griefing peran orang-orang di sekeliling kita itu berbeda.
Ada teman yang bisa menangis bersama, supaya emosi bisa terkeluarkan secara maksimal.
Ada teman yang bisa menangis dan berpelukan bersama, supaya membuat the crying person itu tahu kalau she is not alone.
Ada teman yang bertugas memecahkan kebekuan, mencairkan suasana dengan joke yang nggak lucu, at least membuat kesedihan terlupakan walau untuk sementara.
Ada teman yang bertugas hanya untuk memeluk, untuk menguatkan yang ditinggalkan.
Dan mungkin ada peran lain? Entahlah...

Saya tahu, pada saat kita kehilangan seseorang itu, rasanya berat banget. Kosong. Rasanya seramai apapun keadaan sekitar kita, kita tetap merasa kesepian, feel alone. Makanya saya tidak mau orang lain merasa sendiri, saya mau mereka tetap tahu kalau saya ada di samping mereka. Dengan cara: tidak ikut menangis.

Mungkin saya memang tidak bisa ikut menangis, tapi percaya deh.. Your pain is my pain, your loss is my loss.
Mungkin teman saya yang sedang bersedih itu merasa saya tidak ikut bersedih, tapi percaya deh deep down inside saya sedih. Bedanya, kalau dia menangis, saya berusaha untuk menahan tangis saya. Saya tidak mau mereka semakin sedih melihat saya ikut menangis. Kinda wierd huh?

Perhaps, i am indeed lousy in handling a crying person, but i am definitely the person that you can count on. Whenever you need me, i'll be there.

congratulation kamarcewek..

2006-08-14T17:01:00.000+08:00

psst.. novel kamarcewek dah di publish euy.. sayang gw baru bisa bacanya desember besok..

sudah bisa dibeli di gramedia.. congrats yah jeng okke, akhirnya salah satu impian lo tercapai juga.. ditunggu novel solonya loh.. hahaha..

btw ke, mo ngirim novel kamarcewek ke brisbane gak?? hahahaha..

talk

2006-08-13T09:40:00.000+08:00

At the end of the day there are some things you just can’t help but talk about.
Some things we just don’t want to hear.
And some things we say because we can’t be silent any longer.
Some things are more than what you say. They’re what you do.
Some things you say because there’s no other choice.
Some things you keep to yourself.
And not too often … but every now and then …
… some things simply speak for themselves.
(Grey's Anatomy)

Well, basically it's about speak up your mind. Even though sometimes somehow you are too afraid to show it. You afraid to express it because you worried others will judge you.

Mungkin hal yang paling kita takuti di dunia bukan hal yang menyeramkan, bukan setan yang ada tv, bukan penjahat yang ada di koran, atau bukan sesuatu yang memang physically membuat kita tidak bisa tidur.

Mungkin yang paling kita takuti di dunia adalah bagaimana orang lain menilai diri kita. Ada orang yang bisa menerima kalau dia akan dinilai negative oleh orang lain, and don't give a damn about it. Tapi ada juga beberapa dari kita yang ingin dilihat sempurna oleh orang lain. Behave in every situation and act like every body want them to act.

Anyway, gw percaya, sometimes somehow, ada kalanya orang akan menampilkan dirinya sendiri. Akan mengekspresikan pikirannya sendiri tanpa peduli dengan komentar orang lain. Masalahnya cuma satu: timing. When they will express it?? When they will show it??

last day on earth

2006-08-11T17:39:00.000+08:00

Here is the question:

If this was your last day on Earth, how would you wanna spend it? (Grey's Anatomy)

Hmm.. My answer would be.. I wanna spend it with my family. Stay at home with my family would be great to spend my last day on earth. That's it, that's all.

sick

2006-08-10T11:53:00.000+08:00

i am sick.

i hate to be a sick person.

bete.. karena terlalu sakit, sampai membuat gw tidak ikut lecture dan tutorial. satu hal yang jarang terjadi, karena biasanya gw paksain datang.

aaaahhhhhhhh.. pengen cepet2 sembuh!!

change.. it's not that bad..

2006-07-30T14:39:00.000+08:00

everyday is passing quickly like a bullet train and time wil not impressed with your comments ; pictures will never replace having been there, words can never replace feelings, goodbyes will always hurts ; we're moving on and we cant slow down, these memories are playing like a film without sound ; these are the days we will remember, these are the times we've shared, these are the promises we've made, these are the days ; why dont we hit restart and pause it at our favourite parts? ; its never easy to understand, why memories hold our hands but people let go ; if i could i would do all of this again, travel back in time with you to where this all began ; as we go on we remember all the times we had together and as our lives change come whatever we will still be friends forever ; we cant stop the change anymore than we cant stop the suns from settings ; good things wont last forever, Nothing Gold Can Stay ! (sepupu saya, 2006 cited from her friendster profile)

"Look, nobody understands wanting things to say the same like I do. I was happy in New York! Okay, and I tried really hard to keep things from changing, but everyone else got married, and had kids, and moved on. They all changed. So, I’m giving change a shot, and it has been hard. But, okay, just hoping things stay the same, it doesn’t work." (Joey, episode 1; season 1)

Okay! Here's my theory: change is suck! Separation is hell! But somehow we don't have choices, we have to live with it. That's life! That's the reality.

Change is a process, process to be mature, to be more grown up than we used to be.

Awalnya aneka perubahan dalam hidup gw dimulai dari gw kelas 4 sd: gw harus pindah ke Banda Aceh untuk mengikuti papa yang dipindah kesana. Gw sebel. Untuk seorang anak kelas 4 sd yang lagi seneng banget punya sahabat, tiba-tiba harus pindah, meninggalkan comfort zone nya. Gw nggak punya pilihan kecuali ngikutin orang tua donk. Ya sudah, walau pun sedih gw ikut pindah. Sampai di Banda Aceh gw harus adaptasi lagi. Mencari teman baru, mempelajari budaya baru, dan bahkan mempelajari bahasa baru!! Tapi dibali semua itu, gw menyadari kalau pindah bukan hal yang jelek juga. Walaupun gw kehilangan teman, tapi gw juga mendapatkan teman baru. Lalu, 1 hal yang membuat gw merasa beruntung banget pindah ke Aceh adalah gw jadi sadar kalau sebenanya gw itu mampu dalam masalah akademis. Di Jakarta, gw bukan termasuk siswa yang pinter, termasuk biasa saja. Bahkan sesaat sebelum pindah gw peringkat 30 dari 40 siswa. Hahaha.. Feel like an idiot. But what the hell, peringkat bukan hal yang penting dalam keluarga gw, jadi gw tidak merasa terbebani dengan itu. Pada saat pindah ke Aceh, tiba2 gw menjadi peringkat 1. Hahaha.. Sangat tidak terbayangkan. Hikmah dibalik perpindahan itu adalah naiknya self-confidence gw!! Gw jadi tau kalau gw itu pinter! Hahaha.. Sebenarnya gw rada tidak betah di SD gw itu, terutama dalam masalah pergaulan, cuma ya gimana lagi. Masa mau pindah?? Kenapa gw tidak suka? Karena gw merasa apa yang mereka bicarakan tidak sama dengan yang gw bicarakan. Ya sorry dorry morry nih, temen2 SD gw rada sedikit kampungan. Gw kaget, dari yang temennya anak kota jadi temenan sama anak kampung. Tapi,g w tidak mau pasrah. Gw mencoba memahami mereka walau sedikit ngomel.

Masuk SMP, gw masuk sekolah favorite. Enaknya SMP gw itu, gw bertemu dengan teman2 yang asyik. Membuat masa2 SMP gw benar2 tidak terlupakan. Sayangnya, pada saat saya ke Jakarta untuk urusan keluarga, Aceh dilanda kerusuhan. Membuat saya tidak bisa kembali kesana karena keadaan yang tidak aman. Gw shock. Hell, i was so miserable. Gw pindah tanpa pamit! Gw pindah tanpa bikin perpisahan sama sahabat2 gw! Gw pindah tanpa ada persiapan moral! Dan yang menyebalkan gw pindah tanggung!! Dalam arti, masa kelas 2 SMP gw belum selesai. Tinggal 2 minggu menjelang ujian kenaikan kelas. Kya.. Mau nangis!! Dan yang bikin gw tambah menderita adalah the fact that it was only me and my little sister. Berarti gw harus tanggung jawab soal dia. Nyokap harus balik ke Aceh untuk mengurusi kepindahan. Untuk naik kelas gw harus usaha gila2an, masih stress dan harus mempelajari pelajaran baru. Yah untung gw naik, walau pas2an. Di kelas 3, gw ketemu sama orang yang asyik banget. Dan mbak ini kadang suka baca blog gw (Nenek!! gw kangen banget sama lo nek!!!). Orang tua gw pindah ke Bali, dan karena tidak mungkin gw langsung pindah ke Bali, gw menghabiskan masa kelas 3 SMP gw di Jakarta. Ok. Gak masalah, yang bikin masalah adalah pada saat gw harus pindah rumah selama gw di Jakarta. Awalnya gw tidur di kamar sepupu gw (gw tinggal di rumah tante dan nenek gw), tapi trus karena dia tiba2 secara mendadak pengen punya kamar sendiri. Gw harus pindah ke kamar atas (di lantai dua maksudnya). Ya udah, gw nurut, walau pada saat gw ngadu ke nyokap, nyokap ikutan kesel. Lalu tidak lama gw dan adik gw merasa nyaman di kamar baru, kita harus pindah ke rumah oom gw karena nenek gw sakit. Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh.. Pengen teriak. Udah jauh dari nyokap bokap, dioper sana-sini, berasa gak ada yang mau nerima tau gak! Untung oom dan tante gw itu baik banget!!! Gw bener2 dibuat betah di rumahnya. Gw juga jadi sayang banget sama mereka. Karena punya sahabat yang enak banget, gw sempet nggak mau pindah ke Bali. Gw mau SMA di Jakarta aja karena gw dah merasa cape untuk pindah2. Tapi ya mau gimana lagi, gw harus pindah ke Bali.

SMA kelas 1 gw habiskan di Bali. Awalnya gw merengut! Yang membuat gw senang cuma karena gw akan tinggal di tempat orang pergi liburan, which mean: Gw akan selalu berlibur!! Dan untungnya lagi-lagi gw mendapatkan SMA yang asyik, teman2 yang mengasyikkan. Dan membuat gw tidak mau pindah. Tapi kayaknya memang nasib gw gak boleh bersenang-senang kali yah, baru 1 tahun disana, bokap sudah harus pindah. Back to Jakarta. Aaaahhh.. Dalam pikiran gw waktu itu: "Duh, gak bisa liat orang senang yah??"

Masa SMA selanjutnya gw balik ke Jakarta. Biasa saja. Kalau semua orang bilang masa SMA itu masa yang menyenangkan, itu tidak berlaku buat gw. Gw pengen cepet2 kuliah biar gw bisa menghabiskan waktu dengan tidak pindah. Bayangin aja gw selalu sekolah di dua tempat, di bayangan gw kan kuliah lo gak bisa pindah. Eh, ternyata gw salah! Gw masuk ke twinning program. Yang berarti gw harus sekolah di 2 tempat. Hahaha..

Masa kuliah sampe sekarang (tahun ke-4 jo!!! Wish me luck euy!) termasuk masa-masa yang menyenangkan buat gw. Ketemu angkatan 2003 yang top abis (hallo sayang2ku.. aku tau beberapa dari kamu membaca blog ini.. hahahaha). Perpindahan ke Brisbane juga bukan hal yang berat. Mungkin berat di awal, tapi lama-lama gw gak mau balik ah. Enakan di Brisbane daripada di Jakarta. Hihihihi..

Anyway, lama2 gw pikir perubahan itu tidak ada salahnya kok. Memang menyebalkan, memang membuat bete, tapi kalau kita sendiri mau terbuka dengan hal yang baru tidak akan masalah kok. Eh, tapi jangan kira saya sudah terbiasa dengan perubahan yah. Tetap saja kok saya haru adaptasi di berbagai hal. Perubahan kan tidak terjadi setahun sekali, perubahan itu terjadi setip saat, setiap detik. Dan setiap detik itu juga saya harus belajar untuk menghadapi aneka perubahan.

"...our lives changed because they had to..." (Sisterhood of The Travelling Pants)

Enjoy the change my friends! Enjoy your life.

to you..

2006-07-28T23:00:00.000+08:00

It would be easy to say...
That the pants changed everything that summer.
But looking back now...
i feel like our lives changed because they had to.
And that the real magic of the pantswas in bearing witness to all of this.
And in somehow holding us together...
when it felt like nothing would ever be the same again.
Some things never would be.
But we knew now that no matter how far we traveled on our own separate paths...
Somehow we would always find...
our way back to each other.

Hand with that, we could get through anything.

To us. Who we were, and who we are.

And who we'll be.

To the pants. And the sisterhood.

And this moment, and the rest of our lives.

Together and apart.

(Sisterhood of The Travelling Pants)

tidak seaman itu..

2006-07-16T22:31:00.000+08:00

ternyata.. Brisbane tidak seaman itu.

teman saya memang ada yang menemukan kembali handphone atau dompet yang tertinggal. tapi ada juga yang tetap kemalingan atau hampir dimalingin.

intinya, dimana pun kita berada harus tetap waspada deh. gila, kok gw jadi merinding gini yah. kalau nanti gw yang mengalami hal itu bagaimana?

menikmati indahnya dunia

2006-07-15T20:26:00.000+08:00

..menikmati indahnya dunia..

..indahnya kalau lagi liburan..
..indahnya kalau tidak ada tugas..
..indahnya kalau tidak ada ujian..
..indahnya kalau sedang bersama keluarga..
..indahnya kalau sedang bersenang-senang..
..indahnya kalau kita bisa pergi ke semua tempat..
..indahnya kalau tidak ada beban pikiran..

tapi.. tidak indah ketika membayangkan pekerjaan double yang harus saya kerjakan semester depan..

my list:
1. menjalani penyiksaan kuliah semester terakhir. selamat datang: assessment, psychotheraphy, intergroup relationship, dan life-span development.
2. mengerjakan aneka tugas.
3. belajar dan menghadapi ujian.
4. memulai skripsi. aaaaaarrrrrrhhhhhh..

anyway, sedih juga yah..

semester ini adalah semester terakhir saya di UQ.

tidak rela, belum rela..

tidak rela dan belum rela meninggalkan Brisbane dan UQ. dan kebebasan.

Italia.. My lovers..

2006-07-05T10:27:00.000+08:00

Italia masuk final piala dunia euy. Siapa yang menyangka coba kalau Jerman sang tuan rumah bisa dikalahkan oleh Italia?

Italia kan jarang sekali dijagokan oleh orang, tapi saya mah dari dulu setia sama Italia.

Hidup Italia deh pokoknya. Hahaha..

happy

2006-07-01T20:08:00.000+08:00

i'm happy if you are happy..

i'm happy because i know you dreamt about this..

i'm happy because i know you deserve it..

i'm happy because you are happy.

it's over, period.

2006-06-22T15:44:00.000+08:00

it's over, period.

at least for this semester. well, just wait and see.

take care bro..

2006-06-17T20:23:00.000+08:00

My bro..

You won't read this blog duh. I know.

Well, i just want to say good luck for you.

Away from everything that makes you under pressure. Away from all your misery. Away from Jakarta and takes a good step in your life. Moving to that place will be good for you. Start the new life and make us proud again like the old times. But remember, moving away is not solving your problems. You can not running from your problems.

Just promise to me, you won't trapped again in the same place. You will catch your dream and do not let those things destroy you, again.

Good luck my dear bro.

Wish you all the best, as always.

We'll meet again, when you and i..

When you and i make them proud.

See you in Jakarta huh?

ketika harapan berbeda dengan kenyataan..

2006-06-17T18:21:00.000+08:00

Ketika harapan berbeda dengan kenyataan.

Sering tidak berada dalam posisi seperti ini?

Saya berharap saya bisa dalam ujian statistik tadi, kenyataannya saya tidak bisa.
Saya berharap saya bisa mempertahankan GPA saya semester ini, tapi kenyataannya tidak mungkin.
Seorang teman berharap mendapat nilai paling tinggi, tapi pada kenyataannya dia tidak bisa mencapai keinginnannya.

Dan kita cenderung menghibur diri kita sendiri (dan orang lain) dengan mengatakan "Ya sudahlah, yang berlalu biarkanlah berlalu. Jangan dipikirkan!"

Tapi, bagi saya, semakin kita mendengar atau bahkan mengucapkan itu, hasilnya malah kita akan terus memikirkannya. Memikirkan angan yang tidak tersampaikan. Lalu pada akhirnya kita malah stress sendiri.

Saya juga begitu. Saya mencoba maju, saya mencoba untuk tidak memikirkan angan yang tidak tersampaikan itu, tapi kok saya pusing yah?

Ada tips untuk menghilangkan kepusingan dan kepanikan ini??

dewasa..

2006-06-17T16:59:00.000+08:00

Masalah ada untuk membuat kita belajar menjadi dewasa.

Kalau tidak bertemu dengan masalah, kita tidak akan mengerti susahnya dunia.

Huh. Belajar menjadi orang dewasa itu susah yah. Apakah sekarang saya sudah cukup dewasa?

Buka hati, jaga hati.
Buka mata, buka telinga.
Buka pikiran, jaga pikiran.
Belajar mendengar, belajar berbicara.
Jaga mulut, jaga prilaku.

May be it's time.. It's time for me to learn how to grow up.

wish me luck - part 3

2006-06-16T16:59:00.000+08:00

wish me luck - part 3

Besok saya mau ujian Psychological Research Methods III.
Susah! Hiks.. Takut euy..

Sudah belajar bersama teman-teman saja masih tidak mengerti. Bagaimana kalau belajar sendiri?

Ah, ntar kerja gak mau bagian research ah. Cape..

wish me luck yah.. Semoga besok soalnya tidak sesusah bayangan saya.

wish me luck - part 2

2006-06-13T22:16:00.000+08:00

Wish me luck - part 2

Kali ini saya sagat butuh doanya. Kalau psychopathology kemarin nilai tugas saya membantu, tapi untuk The Social Psychology of Human Communication kayaknya nilai tugas saya tidak membantu deh. Have to try really hard on the exam. I rely on it!

Hiks.. Susah..
Hiks.. Gak ngerti..
Hiks.. Kangen rumah..
Hiks.. Kangen ibu dan papa..
Hiks.. Takut mengecewakan..

Doain yah!! Semangat!!

Trust No 1

2006-06-12T16:52:00.000+08:00

Trust No 1. Itu salah satu quote dari The X-Files yang saya suka. Menurut saya, kalimat itu bisa mempunyai 2 meaning yang berbeda kalau diinterpretasikan ke bahasa Indonesia (menurut saya yah, interpretasi saya sedikit ngasal pula. Hihihi..). Trust no one (jangan percaya siapa pun) atau Trust number one (kepercayaan itu paling penting). Anyway, saya bukan mau membahas The X-Files kok, saya hanya mau membicarakan masalah kepercayaan.

Kemarin ini, ketika saya chat dengan keluarga saya di Jakarta, saya dan adik saya, Ifa, membicarakan masalah kepercayaan. Dia bertanya: "Mbak, gimana sih supaya bisa dipercaya sama mama dan papa?" "Mbak, gimana caranya supaya mama papa bisa percaya sama Dewa (adik saya yang satu lagi)?"

Hahaha.. Saya hanya bisa tertawa mendengar itu. Saya tahu kalau orang tua saya mengalami kesulitan untuk mempercayai kedua adik saya itu, tapi saya juga tahu alasan mereka, walau alasan mereka sedikit berlebihan buat saya, tapi saya mengerti lah, namanya juga kekhawatiran orang tua. Ifa, tidak diizinkan kuliah di luar, jangankan untuk kuliah di Australia seperti saya ini, kuliah di Bandung saja tidak boleh. Harus di Jakarta. Alasannya: Adik saya itu belum bisa menjaga diri dan gampang sekali terpengaruh oleh orang lain. Saya tahu adik saya itu memang demikian adanya, tapi saya juga yakin kalau dia bisa belajar dan berubah. At least dia harus kena "getah"nya dulu baru bisa berubah. Tapi entahlah, nampaknya orang tua saya belum bisa percaya dan adik saya itu juga belum bisa meyakinkan orang tua saya kalau dia itu sudah besar. Ifa juga susah sekali berbicara kepada orang tua saya, saya menjadi mediator mereka. Saya yang mengutarakan apa yang Ifa mau kepada orang tua saya. Nah, gimana orang tua saya mau percaya kalau si Ifa jarang sekali mengatakan sesuatu kepada mereka. Lucunya, ibu saya sering tahu kalau Ifa sedang ada masalah (kata ibu saya: "Kelihatan dari wajahnya!"), tapi Ifa as usual tidak mau menceritakan apa-apa. Ibu saya langsung menyuruh saya untuk bertanya kepada Ifa. Walau lewat SMS, Ifa langsung menceritakan apa yang terjadi kepada saya. Hahaha.. Saya langsung tertawa, dan akhirnya saya mencoba meyakinkan dia untuk berbicara pada ibu. Hasilnya: berhasil!! Hahaha.. Tetap melalui saya sebagai penengah.

Dewa, si laki-laki bungsu dalam keluarga, lagi dalam masa puber. Lagi zamannya abg. Orang tua saya takut sekali kalau dia kenapa-kenapa dalam pergaulan, soalnya bapak saya zaman mudanya sangat bandel jadi beliau takut karma (hihihih..!!). Dewa itu keras kepala, susah sekali dibilangin. Biasanya dia hanya nurut sama saya (itu juga karena dia manja sekali sama saya), tapi semenjak saya kuliah di sini, dia semakin tidak bisa dibilangin. Tapi susah juga yah, kalau dia dilarang nanti semakin menjadi-jadi. Hahaha.. Saya bilang saja kepada orang tua saya, biarkan saja dia nanti juga cerita sendiri. Hehehe.. Dahulu, selain ke saya, dia juga dekat dengan papa saya. Tapi sekarang papa saya semakin sibuk dan sudah jarang menghabiskan waktu bersama dia lagi.

Kalau saya, hmm.. Saya juga bingung kenapa orang tua saya percaya sama saya. Dan hasilnya: saya tidak mau mengecewakan mereka. Sekalinya saya berbohong, waduh bisa terbawa mimpi!! I'm feeling guilty. Kenapa yah mereka percaya? Pernah ibu saya bilang, kalau saya itu orangnya punya pendirian, tidak gampang terpengaruh. Lalu saya itu bisa mandiri, tidak tergantung dengan orang lain, bagi saya, pergi sendiri itu tidak masalah (sementara buat adik saya itu menjadi masalah). Hahaha.. memang saya begitu yah??

Anyway, kepercayaan itu penting yah. Dasar dari segalanya, apalagi dalam kehidupan sehari-hari, atau dalam masalah pertemanan, pacaran, sampai pernikahan. Rasa percaya itu dasarnya. Coba, mana mungkin kita curhat kalau tidak percaya sama teman!

It takes times to develop trust. And we have to try it hard to gain trust from others.

Kalau kita belum bisa percaya sama seseorang, mana mungkin kita bisa membiarkan orang itu masuk ke dalam lingkungan kita?

lalu..

Untuk orang tua: Kalau mereka belum bisa percaya sama kita, mana mungkin mereka melepaskan kita pergi?

one down

2006-06-10T14:34:00.000+08:00

one down!!!

bye-bye psychopathology!!! i hope that i won't need to meet you again.

because enough is enough.

wish me luck - part 1

2006-06-09T22:21:00.000+08:00

besok saya akan ujian psychopathology. ituloh, tentang mental disorder, abnormal behavior, phobia, dan lain-lain.. ituloh, yang tugasnya bikin saya nangis dan mengadu ke banyak orang (dan Alhamdulillah dapet nilai lumayan)..

doain yah.. bahannya banyak banget!! mau nangis rasanya..

eh eh.. piala dunia dah mulai nih.. jagoan saya Italia.. jagoan kamu siapa?? saya ingin sekali menonton pertandingannya malam ini. tapi saya besok harus ujian, gila aja kalau saya nonton. tapi sayangnya ada orang yang rada gak sopan (hahahaha!!) dan membuat saya bete.

pertanyaan: apakah kesopanan masih dibutuhkan jika kita tinggal di luar negeri? yang notabene tanpa orang tua dan bebas bisa ngapain aja.
jawaban: IYA!!! sayangnya banyak orang yang gak sopan yang dan membuat saya males.

pertanyaan: apakah saya kolot??
jawaban: mungkin. I don't care.

pertanyaan: is that a big deal?
jawaban: yes it is. It disturpts me!

anyway.. gotta sleep.. tomorrow is my big day part 1. facing the end of psychopathology. wish me luck guys!! seriously, i really need it.

if he loves you enough..

2006-06-04T23:26:00.000+08:00

if he loves you enough, he would not say anything to make you sad..

if he loves you enough, he would wait for you, no matter how long is it until you are ready..

if he loves you enough, he would let you do anything you want..

if he loves you enough, he would accept you in every conditions, even it is in your past..

if he loves you enough, he would not forbid you for doing anything you like, anything you want..

if he loves you enough, he would not act like a child, he would be your guide indeed..

if he loves you enough, he would let you go without ask you to return things back..

if he loves you enough, he would let you go because it is your choice, not others..

if he loves you enough, he would let you go and wait for you until you sure about your feelings..

if he loves you enough, he would let you go because you already got someone..

if he loves you enough, he would respect your feelings, and your decission..

if he loves you enough, he would say it loud..

if he loves you enough, he would not ask something that you can not give..

if he loves you enough, he would ....

almost over - part 1

2006-06-04T23:21:00.000+08:00

the never ending assignments for this semester is almost over.

next: the never ending exams.

rewards for those never ending uni-things: SYDNEY!! Can't wait to go there!!

wish me luck guys!

malas..

2006-05-30T19:40:00.000+08:00

malas euy ngerjain tugas!

happy birthday my dear housemate..

2006-05-25T23:25:00.000+08:00

Kemarin adalah hari yang menyenangkan, the sweatest day for me, and for my friends, especially for my housemate (iyah, kamu pasti membaca blog saya, saya tahu).

Util, housemate saya yang satu itu ulang tahun. Biasanya saya jarang menuliskan ulang tahun orang lain, tapi saya suka sekali dengan acara ulang tahun dia tahun ini.

Yup, it was a surprise party! However, it was an unusual birthday party.

Saya dan "keluarga" saya mulai merencanakan acara ini sekitar minggu lalu. Dimulai dari pembicaraan masalah kado (awalnya tanggung jawab diserahkan kepada saya, tapi apa daya saya kalah bid di ebay! Kalah 10 detik! Sebel...!!!), lalu kita mulai membicarakan acaranya. Tahun lalu, acara ulang tahun dia merupakan surprise party pertama di angkatan gw. Sukses? Sukseslah, kan saya yang mengkoordinir. Hahaha... Rasanya males kalau kita membuat acara yang sama. Makanya untuk tahun ini kita mencoba seusatu yang baru. Usul saya: Bagaimana kalau surprise partynya diadakan malah hari di hari ulang tahunnya. Jadi tengah malam kita hanya mengucapkan selamat seperti biasa. Dan untuk kali ini kita maunya yang benar-benar bisa dikenang.

Hasilnya: Keren!! It was so sweet. Saya saja sampai senang sendiri melihatnya.

Saya dan Pating (Housemate saya satu lagi, hi sayang!), mengucapkan tengah malam, tidak ada indikasi bahwa akan mengadakan acara. Kami hanya menyediakan es krim plus strawberry sebagai kue dan korek sebagai pengganti lilin. Sangat tidak siap, dan memang tidak berniat untuk menyiapkan. Util hanya tertawa melihat kami. Kita mengobrol sebentar di kamarnya sebelum akhirnya kembali ke kegiatan masing-masing.

Keesokan harinya, saya dan pating harus ke kampus lebih cepat. Util di rumah. Sorenya, saya dan util menjadi panitia acara seminar kampus. Tugas saya memang menahan util di kampus lebih lama, sehingga teman-teman yang lain bisa bersiap di lapangan depan apartemen kami. Untung Util mau membantu saya, sempat bingung kalau dia tidak mau menemani saya. Akhirnya setelah memastikan semua yang disana sudah siap, saya dan Util berjalan pulang.

Di tengah jalan, nyaris saja acara yang sudah disusun sedemikian rupa hancur berantakan gara-gara keceplosan seorang adik kelas saya. Untung saya bisa mengalihkan pembicaraan dan Util tidak cerita. Setelah dekat rumah, saya me-miss call teman saya sebagai tanda kalau mereka sudah bisa muncul di balik bukit lapangan. Mereka muncul dengan membawa spanduk bertulisan "Happy Birthday" dan wayang huruf sesuai nama Util, plus mereka masing-masing membawa kembang api. Wah, keren banget!! It was so sweet. Saya saja yang melihatnya bisa terpana. Karena memang benar-benar mengejutkan dan bikin terharu. Hahaha.. Util kaget (ya gak til?), she was very surprised. Lapangan itu letaknya diseberang jalan, jadi kami harus menyebrang sebelum bisa bergabung dengan mereka. Ketika masih bersebrangan, mereka menyanyikan lagu happy birthday untuk Util. Lucu deh! Sempat membuat beberapa pengemudi memelankan mobilnya.

Apakah surprise partynya sampai situ saja? Tentu tidak. Surprise berikutnya adalah barbeque party. Saya tahu kalau Util ingin sekali mengadakan barbeque dengan anak-anak. Makanya kami mengadakan surprise barbeque di apartemen. Lagi-lagi dia terkejut! Dia sudah bertanya kepada saya, apakah rumah kita bersih atau tidak. Hahahaha.. Tampang kagetnya belum hilang, kejutan lainnya sudah menanti.

Pada saat Util berbaur dengan teman lain, saya dan "keluarga" saya lari ke unit lain yang kami jadikan markas. Kami menyediakan kue ulang tahun, dan kita ber-5 keluar rumah dengan membawa kue ulang tahun ini. Sambil bernyanyi tentunya, hanya saja suaranya sudah sedikit hilang. Hahahaha.. Kuenya enak loh!!

Lalu acara pun berlangsung lancar dan ramai, sampai-sampai ditegur manager apartemen saya! Hahahaha..

Anyway, happy birthday Util. Wish you all the best!

shit happened!

2006-05-18T17:34:00.000+08:00

My friends,

I think you're right. Shit happened!

samaners, angklungers, Indonesianers...

2006-05-11T13:57:00.000+08:00

Hari ini, secara tiba2 saya diajak untuk bermain angklung di sebuah sekolah di Indoroopilly, Brisbane. Saya sedikit kaget, karena saya sudah lama sekali tidak bermain angklung. Tapi, saya pikir karena para angklungers kebetulan sedang kekurangan orang dan acaranya hanya scala sekolah dan tidak besar, maka saya mengiyakan ajakan itu.

Saya tidak sempat latihan angklung, langsung manggung. Dan saya manggung di hadapan murid2 sekolah itu. Sekolah itu sendiri mempunyai banyak murid, dari SD sampai SMA kali yah. Tadi itu acara multi-cultural day. Banyak stand makanan dari aneka negara, dan banyak yang memakai pakaian kebangsaan negara2 lain. Seperti kimono, pakaian korea, dan bahkan batik (kebetulan anak Indonesia ada yang sekolah disana)!

Ketika manggung, banyak orang asing yang tertarik dengan penampilan kita. Dan setelah kita selesai manggung, kita disediakan sebuah ruangan untuk mengajar anak2 yang tertarik untuk bermain angklung. Awalnya sih kita kira tidak akan ada yang datang, tapi ternyata dari anak kecil sampai nenek2 banyak yang tertarik bermain angklung. Bahkan ada yang betah dan tidak mau keluar ruangan sampai berakhirnya jadwal kita. Antusiasme mereka besar sekali. Bagi mereka, alat musik angklung itu adalah sesuatu yang baru. Karena mereka antusias, kita sebagai angklungers (sebutan untuk anak2 uqisa yang main angklung) juga ikutan antusias, antusias mengajarkan walau perut kelaparan. Hahaha..

Hidup angklungers deh pokoknya! Eh, hidup samaners juga deh.

Nah, kalau samaners itu sebutan untuk anak2 pecinta saman. Tidak hanya penari, tapi juga offical nya, contohnya saya. Saya tidak menari saman, tapi saya selalu ada pada saat teman2 saya menari saman. Karena saya selalu ada dalam setiap penampilan saman housemate saya, dan bahkan terkadang pada saat latihan saya juga ada, saya sering dibilang sebagai komentator, menejer tidak resmi, dan offical saman. Hahaha..

Kemarin ini saman manggung di Southbank. Acara Budha Festival, acara skala besar karena orang2 Brisbane pada datang kesana. Latihannya sudah dari seminggu sebelumnya. Dan saya hobby sekali mengomentari latihan mereka. Pokoknya gerakannya diulang terus sampai saya bilang bagus. Sedikit tidak enak, tapi itu kan permintaan mereka. Bahkan saya sudah hafal kesalahan mereka dimana, gerakan individual dan kekuarangan mereka. Dan saya juga tahu kapan gerakan mereka bagus. Makanya pada saat gladiresik sebelum tampil, saya langsung memberikan aba2 dimana posisi yang bagus untuk mereka. Dan hasilnya: lumayanlah! Overall bagus kok. Mereka banyak didatangi orang2 setelah selesai manggung.

Oh iya, satu lagi tugas saya yang khas sebagai samaners. Mengambil video mereka! Penting itu. Supaya mereka bisa tahu kesalahan mereka dimana. Evaluasi kecil2an lah. Dan tidak lupa, saya bertugas untuk memegang hp dan dompet mereka. Waduh kalau itu hilang, bisa mati saya!

Anyway, saya senang sekali kalau ada acara mangung2 seperti itu. Rasanya bangga sekali menjadi orang Indonesia. Padahal kalau saya di Jakarta, belum tentu saya mau ikut acara seperti ini. Mana mau saya main angklung atau nonton saman. Ternyata, tinggal di luar negeri membuat rasa nasionalisme kita bertambah yah. Bangga loh karena kita punya budaya yang beraneka ragam. Hehehe.. Trus ya, lucu deh.. Pada saat setelah manggung saman, banyak orang2 yang tidak berwajah Indonesia, tiba2 menghampiri kita. "Orang Indonesia yah? Saya juga dari Jakarta kok." Dan mereka bangga sekali menonton saman.

Hmm.. Masa sih untuk meningkatkan rasa nasionalisme perlu ke luar negeri dulu?? Hehehe..

control yourself

2006-05-09T20:25:00.000+08:00

My friends,

Should i remind you that we need to control ourself? Nobody can control yourself.
Don't let somebody take control on you. Or have control on you.

Just be you. And let everybody see you as you are, not for what you wear, not for you body appearance, not for what you have.

If they don't like you for what you are, just leave them. I'll be here. I like you the way you are. And i adore you the way it is.

Anyway, gara2 jeng ini dan mbak yu ini, saya jadi suka lagu Anggun - In your mind. Lagu untuk para cewek yah jengs??

In your mind - Anggun

I don't want to believe
And i don't want to live
By the excuses
Of your weakness

`cause a woman should do
What she wants to do
There is no reason
For your shallow aggravation

Nothing wrong with this dress I wear
Nothing wrong with this smile I dare
Nothing wrong with my long back hair
I'ts all in your mind, in your mind

Nothing wrong with this legs you see
Nothing wrong with this lean body
And nothing wrong with the woman in me
Its' all in your mind, in your mind

I just want to be sure
Don't want anymore
You're calling out names
Oh what a shame

Just open your mind
Then maybe you'll find
That there's no reason
For your shallow aggravation

This is the time
To change your mind
There's still a chance
To change your mind
It's plain to see
From anywhere that the only thing wrong
Is your irritating mind